True North [True North series book 1/3]

“Serin!” I let out a sigh of relief when my eyes met his, and I stretched out my arms. He was at my sight in a split second, pulling me into an embrace. Tears began flowing again, tears of relief, and of heartbreak.

“Tophyn is dead,” I sobbed, getting nauseated by the words as they left my tongue. “Nys is… older. He doesn’t remember me. It’s like I never existed.”

He stroked my hair gently as he shushed me. “It’s okay,” he said, “you’re here now. I remember you.” I balled my hands into fists as I let him pull me closer. “I’m sorry your lost your brother,” he whispered, “brothers. I’m sorry you lost both of them.” He rubbed my back as I sobbed.

“Myrtha died, too,” I said, looking up at him. His beautiful face was clouded with worry and sorrow. “Did anyone else die? Anyone I know?”

Warrian shook his head. “No,” he said, “we all made it out.”

Relief washed over me, drowning out a small part of my sadness.

“Did you kill anyone?” I asked, looking at his hands. Although they had been scrubbed clean, there were still traces of dried blood under his fingernails.

“Yes,” Warrian said monotonously.

“I’m sorry,” I mumbled, and met his eyes once more. “Has Myrtha been buried yet?” I asked softly.

Warrian shook his head. “They’ve just collected the bodies, and are still in the process of identifying and counting them.”

My stomach turned. “What will happen to them afterwards?” I asked. “They are returned to their kin,” Warrian explained, “they usually take them back to graveyards near their homes.”

“Who will come for Myrtha, then?” I asked. Warrian shrugged. “Unclaimed bodies are buried in the graveyard in the valley,” he said.

“I’ll claim her,” I said, freeing myself from Warrian’s embrace. “She died because of me.”

“She would have died anyway, Serin,” a low voice called out from behind me.

“You,” I hissed, “you set her up to die. You told her she would be the one to open the gateway — made her close her eyes and focus. You took away the only splinter of a chance of survival she had. And worse — you made me believe so too. I aided in her death.”

Thoridor’s face was as dark and cold as it had been the first time I had seen him.

“You’re mistaken,” he began, but I didn’t let him finish.

“You knew all along, didn’t you? You knew it wasn’t her. You knew it wasn’t Phaedra either. You deceived all of us.”

“I did it to protect you!” Thoridor bellowed, “and don’t think they didn’t know what they were getting into, Serin. I went to see Myrtha the night before the Sorael. I told her. She knew. Phaedra did too.”

My chest heaved as I tried my best not to fall apart. “Then why didn’t you tell me?” I yelled, “so much of this could have been avoided.”

“Because I didn’t want you to know!” Thoridor yelled back, “I didn’t want you to know you could open the gates yourself. I didn’t want you to know you could return here! You should never have come back.”

“You were the one to tell me it was me, Thoridor!” I yelled back, “your stupid voice in my head — that word you called me. I wouldn’t have known if you hadn’t done that.”

“Wait,” Warrian interrupted me, “you heard his voice? In your head?” he turned to look at Thoridor.

They stared at each other for a long moment, and I strongly got the sense they both knew something I didn’t.

“That’s why you—”

“Not now, Warrian,” Thoridor cut him off. Warrian’s eyes darted back and forth between Thoridor and me.

“Does she know?” he asked, an unreadable expression on his face.

“Not now,” Thoridor growled again.

“Do I know what?” I demanded, wrecking my brain over what else I had missed. Hearing his voice in my head — what could that mean? I had never heard anybody else’s voice in my head before.

And then it hit me. It hit me like a war hammer. I didn’t know why I hadn’t realized before. It seemed clear as day now.

Warrian had asked me if I’d had anything to eat before, when he had tried feeding me the soup laced with his blood. I had. I’d had that drink — the first drink Thoridor had made me. That had tasted like blood too. I had assumed that was just what food tasted like to me, but I had since learned about the Wisproot being a facade.

I had drunk blood before. And Thoridor had bitten me moments later. I remembered Warrian’s concern upon hearing Thoridor had bitten me. “Bite you?!” he had echoed, scanning the skin of my neck with his eyes, “did he draw blood?” I had been so blind.

“You fed me your blood,” I stammered in disbelief, looking up at Thoridor. “You made Warrian seem like a villain for trying, when you already had done it yourself?!”

Thoridor clenched his jaw. “I need you to know,” he began.

“Save it, Thoridor,” I spat, “I cannot believe you just stood there and lied to my face. Is that why you bit me, that first night?! To drink my blood too? To complete the blood ritual without my consent? Without me even knowing about it?!”

“Serin, remember what I told you,” Thoridor said, “it doesn’t establish a mating bond. It only works if—”

“If the bond is already there, yes,” I replied. “And when did you find out about this ‘bond’ between us, then?”

“Before you got here,” Thoridor said. “Warrian, maybe you should—,”

“Warrian is staying,” I shouted, and grabbed Warrian’s wrist.

Thoridor sighed. “At least let me explain. Let’s go somewhere we can talk.” He gestured to a room down the hall.

Warrian waited for me to decide whether or not to follow him. I grabbed his hand, and followed Thoridor into the room. We all sat down at the table, Thoridor on one side, and Warrian and I on the other.

“Speak,” I commanded. And Thoridor did.