Sin and Redemption

If I’d known that spending a weekend in the Hamptons with Amo and Greta and their nonstop public displays of affection would lead to Sara and me sharing a bed, I would have done it a long time ago, even if I felt like a weakling for waking her with my nightmare. Sara was still asleep beside me, curled up on her side, her lips slightly parted. The blanket had gathered at her waist, but her pajamas protected her modesty well. I stifled a chuckle.

I had briefly harbored hope that she would wear something sexy and maybe even be up for some intimacy after our last sexual encounters, but I shouldn’t be surprised that Sara wasn’t up for sex during her period. I had no business being bitter about it. Fuck, I should be grateful she tolerated my closeness at all. We made progress, and that was enough.

Her eyes fluttered open, and a look of confusion passed on her face before she sat up with a shy smile. “Hey, how long have you watched me sleep?”

“I didn’t really watch you. I was lost in thoughts.”

She sent me a doubtful look. “What were you thinking about?”

I considered lying, but that wasn’t what I wanted for this marriage. “About our progress.”

“That’s good, right?”

“It’s good,” I agreed.

When we returned home in the afternoon, Sara made me move my stuff to the primary bedroom. I was still cautious, so I didn’t take everything with me. It would spare me work if things didn’t go well.

As with our first night together, Sara and I only slept in the same bed. We didn’t touch or cuddle, much less have passionate sex like I was hoping for.

I snuck out of bed and hit the gym early as usual. It spared us the awkwardness when we woke up beside each other and helped me wake up for the day. My sleep was still bad. I often woke because of nightmares, and if I didn’t wake because of my own, I woke because I wanted to check on Sara to see if her sleep was fitful. To my surprise, she hadn’t woken screaming yet.

I was doing muscle ups when Sara came in, already dressed for the day in jeans and a wool sweater. Her hair was up in a loose updo, and she wore no makeup, but she still looked gorgeous.

“Good morning,” she said with a small smile. “I was wondering if it would be okay if I did some pottery. I want to try the wheel you got me.”

I glanced at the potter’s wheel in one corner of the room, next to the window. I’d gotten rid of my row machine to make room for it. “Sure.”

“Do you want some coffee?”

“Later. Not during my workout.”

Sara nodded but left and returned a couple of minutes later with a coffee mug and a bucket of water. She gathered a bag of clay, then began to gather everything else she needed around herself. She turned the wheel on and slapped a piece of clay on the rotating disk before wetting her hands with water. She positioned herself on the small stool in front of the wheel and began to touch the clay. Soon, it transformed into a tower, then she pressed it down again and let it rise to an even higher creation that reminded me a bit of a cock. An image my brain really didn’t need, especially as I watched Sara stroke and rub the damn thing.

I turned my attention back to the muscle up bar, but it was hard to focus with Sara in a room. She looked even prettier as she concentrated on lovingly caressing that piece of mud.

Who would have thought I’d ever be jealous of clay?

Sara slanted me a look. Then turned back to the clay. She didn’t seem to have trouble focusing on her task. I grabbed my towel and rubbed my hair dry, then went to the kitchen to grab a coffee before returning to the gym room. Sara gave me a distracted smile when I sank down on my bench and drank my coffee while watching her work.

A delicate blush crept up her neck and cheeks. “Isn’t this boring for you?”

I shook my head. “It’s kind of hypnotic.”

She laughed. “I guess.” She slanted me another look, and this time, her gaze definitely lingered on my upper body, which was naked.

I wondered what she thought. “Do my tattoos still bother you?”

She tilted her head. “They never really bothered me. I never liked tattoos, but I like them on you. They’re part of you.”

“Good.” I had another appointment tomorrow to continue my back tattoo. It was difficult because of the burn scars. They weren’t too bad, but scarring always complicated tattoo art.

I kept watching Sara as I drank my coffee, deciding it gave me a sense of peace I really needed before a long day at work.

“Do you want to try it?”

Her question took me by surprise. Doing pottery hadn’t been on my bucket list. My expression made her laugh.

“Or is this too unmanly or uncool for you?” she teased with a pretty smile.

“I’m comfortable in my manliness.” I put the mug down and got up.

Sara rose from the small stool and motioned for me to take her place.

“I’ll be honest. That thing doesn’t look as if it can carry my weight,” I said as I stepped up to her side.

“That’s oak.”

I shrugged and folded myself onto the stool under Sara’s amused eyes.

She pressed against my back and bent over me until she reached my hands. She guided them toward the rotating piece of clay. It felt sticky and cold but soon became warmer under my touch. Sara moved my hands up and down until the thing resembled a massive dick again. I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. “This is by far the weirdest thing I’ve done in my life.”

Sara pursed her lips. “Really?”

“At least it confirms what I knew—I’m not into guys.”

Sara started laughing. “If you put your fingers into the top, it will open up to a vase.”

I closed my eyes. “Not sure you’re making it better with your instructions. This sounds like a kink that should be up on OnlyFans.”

When I opened my eyes again, I was met with her indignant expression. “Come on, don’t tell me you think a man doing pottery is sexy.”

“It’s craft. It doesn’t have to be sexy.”

“It looks sexy when you do it.”

Her pleased smile told me that was the right answer.

Sara

On the following weekend, Maximus and I visited his parents again. We now always tried to spend one day of the weekend with my family and one with his unless Maximus had to work. Sometimes he only had to disappear for a couple of hours if a job waited for him, and sometimes he was gone all day. If that was the case, I visited my family or spent the day with Isa. Going to his parents on my own wasn’t something I’d done yet.

“Maybe we can all do something together as a big family,” I suggested as I cleaned out dozens of dog bowls with a water hose. I wore knee-high winter boots, but part of my short skirt and wool tights had gotten wet by the time I’d figured out how to regulate the water jet. Next time I planned to help in the shelter, I’d have to wear more appropriate clothes.

Maximus put down the huge log and looked up. “They could come over next weekend, and we’ll have a barbecue and sit around the fire pit.”

I followed Maximus’s gaze toward the small but cozy firepit beside the house. “That sounds good. I’ll ask them.”

Maximus grabbed his axe and swung it over his head, splitting the wood.

Bacon perked up. He and the other dogs rested on the porch. They didn’t like water very much, so they’d run off the moment I’d started cleaning the bowls. I wasn’t as nervous around them anymore. Sometimes I was angry with myself for taking so long, over a year, to finally be a part of Maximus’s family and life. “I’m sorry it took me so long to come here with you.”

Maximus paused with a thoughtful look. He put the axe down and came over to me. He gently touched my cheek. “I don’t blame you, nor do my parents. It was understandable after what happened. And it’s not too late. We still have our whole life ahead of us.”

I nodded with a small smile, then gathered my courage and stood on my tiptoes. Maximus lowered his head so I could give him a peck on the lips. I took a step back, glancing at the porch to see if his parents had seen us.

Maximus chuckled and returned to his axe. Before he picked it up again, he removed his shirt. He definitely ran hotter than I did.

I cleared my throat. “I’ll warm up inside for a bit, but I’ll be back soon.”

What a stupid thing to say. I felt hot simply because of our shared moment of intimacy.

I couldn’t deny it. I wanted Maximus. My fertile days were over. There was absolutely no reason to be intimate with Maximus, but seeing him with his bare chest, sweaty and swinging an axe, and remembering how impossibly good he’d made me feel, my body screamed for his touch. I tingled and even felt hot and wet between my legs. The short peck had poured gasoline into my kindling desire.

I wasn’t sure what was wrong with me. Maximus swung the axe again, his muscles flexing. The concentration edged into his face accentuated the rough attractiveness of his face. He wiped the sweat off his forehead with his forearm. His gaze logged on me where I stood on the porch, clutching a thermos, and he slowly lowered his arm, his brows drawing together.

Despite the heat throbbing in my cheeks, I gave him a quick smile. Giving myself a mental kick, I hurried toward him. Cara’s boots were too big for me, and I wasn’t used to wearing lined Wellingtons, so I stumbled over the cut-off branches and twigs that covered the ground. If Maximus hadn’t caught me by the waist, I would have faceplanted right in front of him. My cheek was pressed to his sweaty chest. Heat radiated from his skin, making me feel even hotter, and the scent of his manly sweat only increased the tingling in my body.

He helped me straighten, then scanned me from head to toe. “Did you hurt yourself?”

“No,” I said, mortified. Maximus looked like a beastly man fantasy, and I stumbled along like a klutz. His eyes registered the thermos on the ground. I’d dropped it.

He picked it up with an ironic twitch to his lips. “Good thing you didn’t carry a cup.”

“That’s really a good thing because there’s boiling bone broth inside that thermos. I could have burned you. Instead of being a good wife by taking care of my husband, I would have scalded you.”

“I don’t expect you to serve me food and drinks to be a good wife. I’m glad to have you as my wife, even if you throw burning liquid at me.”

I flushed, my lips parting in surprise. “Have I given you much reason to be glad? Things have been hard.”

“They were hard, yes,” he murmured. His amber eyes were distant, thoughtful. I loved the sound of his deep voice. It always reverberated in the depth of my belly, today in particular. “My father always says good things take work. I’m willing to put the work in.”

I nodded because I didn’t know what to say. I’d focused on having a baby, on creating my family by bringing new life into this world, but Maximus and I were husband and wife. We were the root of that family. We needed to build a foundation for our kids. I needed to make more of an effort if that was ever supposed to happen.

Maximus grabbed a towel from a fallen tree stump. He brought it to my face and wiped my cheek. “There’s some dirt on your face. You should keep your distance from me. I reek and will get you dirty.”

I scanned his body, covered by a fine sheen of dirt that clung to his sweaty skin. I wanted to be with Maximus, and not for any other reason than to feel his touch.

“What’s wrong? I can see that something’s bothering you.”

I was bothered by the sight of him so manly and unhinged. It did things to my body that I didn’t understand.

I slowly shook my head, tearing my eyes away from him and sinking my teeth into my lower lip.

Maximus stepped closer and lightly touched my shoulder. He was still very careful when he touched me despite our last sexual encounters. “Are you worried that it didn’t work again? There’s still the option to go to a clinic if that makes it easier for you.”

Did he think I was worried about having to sleep with him again? I let out an embarrassed smile. “I’m a bit worried, but not for the reason you might think.”

His confused expression made it clear he didn’t understand what I meant.

“I’m not worried about having to sleep with you again if I’m not pregnant this time because I wouldn’t mind doing it even if it’s not about making a baby.” The words rushed out of my mouth so fast I wasn’t sure he understood anything. Yet after a moment of utter confusion, realization set in, and the look on his face changed to desire and something primal that made my core clench.

“You want to…” He was obviously still not convinced I really meant it.

“Actually…phew.” I blew out a breath, embarrassed to say what I felt. “Watching you like this”—I motioned at his half-naked state and the axe behind him—“has made me feel quite…umm.” I gave a nervous giggle, my face bursting with heat.

Maximus understood at once, and the look in his eyes… wow. He held out his hand, and when I took it, he tugged me along deeper into the woods until his parents’ house was no longer visible. He pressed me against a massive tree and cupped my cheek.

“Let me eat you here,” he rasped.

My eyes widened. “Someone could walk up on us.”

“Bacon,” he called, and his dog came running. “Sit and guard.”

The dog sank to the ground and actually began to scan the surroundings.

“He’ll bark if someone approaches the area.”

“Even your parents and your brother? He knows them.”

“He’ll bark,” Maximus assured me in a low voice as he leaned closer, his fingers playing with a few strands of my hair.

I swallowed nervously. From having sex only for reproduction purposes to having Maximus eat me out in the woods was a huge step. One my body was definitely ready for, but my mind still revolted.

“Let me feel the proof of what you said,” Maximus murmured.

“Okay.” Instead of touching me right away, he bent down and kissed me, a slow, sensual kiss that only increased the pressure between my legs. Eventually, he reached under my skirt and slowly slid his huge hand into my tights and panties. The latter clung to me, and he had to tug them away from my heated flesh. When his middle finger wedged between my pussy lips, both he and I let out moans. He brushed my opening, which was sopping wet, and pushed his finger into me up until the first knuckle just to draw out even more of my arousal.

I watched the lust and focus on his face through half-lidded eyes, drawing in a deep breath so his manly scent flooded my nose.

“Fuck, Sara. Knowing you’re wet for me like this makes me the happiest man in the world,” he growled as he stroked me. His amber eyes seemed to burn with lust. He leaned closer once more, his lips against mine as he rumbled, “Let me taste you. Just one fucking taste. Nobody will catch us.”

“Okay,” I said, then held my breath because I never thought I’d have outdoor sex. Maximus kneeled down on the muddy ground and reached under my skirt with both hands, grabbing my tights and pulling them down.

He left my panties in place. Then he disappeared under my skirt. Seeing the outline of his broad shoulders and head poke against the fabric almost made me giggle, but a deep moan took the place of that sound when Maximus tugged the crotch of my panties aside and brushed his nose over my pussy lips. He inhaled deeply, then let his tongue follow the same path as his nose had. “You taste fucking sweet.” His calloused hands pushed my legs farther apart before they gently kneaded my inner thighs. His breathing was hot against my sensitive spot, but he didn’t touch me there. I waited with bated breath, close to despair. His fingers trailed higher, and then his thumbs gently parted my folds. I shivered in anticipation.

“I know I only asked for one taste, but if you don’t mind, I’ll finish my meal,” he growled.

“I don’t,” I pressed out shakily. He leaned forward and slowly dragged his tongue from my opening up to my clit. I watched the motion of his head beneath my skirt, wanting to see him. I gripped the fabric and rolled it up until his muscled shoulders and head came into view. His eyes moved up, but he kept licking me with slow strokes while his thumbs lightly caressed my folds.

“You can’t breathe properly beneath all the fabric.”

The knowing smile that curled his lips made it clear he knew that wasn’t why I’d lifted my skirt.

Luckily, he spared me further embarrassment by breaking our eye contact. His gaze focused on my pussy once more. His mouth cupped my folds and began to suck them. I pressed my hands flat against the tree, my teeth sinking into my lower lip. My body was on fire, and an orgasm was quickly approaching, but I was trying to hold off. I wanted to bask in the sensations for longer. Nothing was better than the buildup to the very first orgasm. That was a lesson I’d learned in our few sexual encounters. My legs began to tremble, but I fought the sensations. Maximus pulled back, and the feeling subsided, but barely. “Want to slow things down?” he growled.

I nodded, taking a deep breath. He brushed two fingers over my pussy, then pushed them into me slowly. I moaned, clenching around him as he pleasured me with circling motions. He watched his fingers inside me with utter concentration and lust. Soon the pleasure was mounting again, and I was sure even just him breathing against my clit would make me explode. He slowed down, his gaze on my face. “You’re so damn wet, Sara. My fingers are coated in your juice. I’ve never seen anything more beautiful than your lustful face.”

I bit my lip, embarrassed, but a hard thrust of his fingers drove the shyness right out of me as I threw my head back, my core clenching again. His fingers moved faster and faster, slapping against me. I began to shake, and when Maximus leaned forward and cupped my clit with his lips, I lost all semblance of control and shook under the violent waves of my orgasm.

Maximus watched me, his mouth on me, driving me even higher until I could hardly take it anymore. He jerked away, his chin and mouth shiny, and smiled up at me with devilish pride.

He stood and kissed me on the way up, leaving my taste on my lips. After a brief mental pep talk, I grabbed his jeans button, then peered up at him for permission.

He laughed sardonically. “You don’t have to ask. Trust me. Whatever you have in mind, I want it too.”

I laughed. “Really? Maybe my mind is a strange place. I’ve read many of Isa’s books.”

“I’m one hundred percent sure, Sara.”

I smiled as I popped open the button, then pulled his fly down. I’d seen Maximus naked before, but this felt different because I’d never touched him. Today, I wanted to feel him, to give him pleasure. I had absolutely no clue what I was going to do, but I hoped my lust would lead me in the right direction. I tugged down Maximus’s jeans and boxers until his cock sprang free. It was already rock hard without a single touch from me. My eyebrows rose.

“Licking you turns me on like crazy, Sara.”

I curled my fingers around his erection, mesmerized by the heat he radiated. His shaft felt silky and smooth. I mapped every inch of him with my fingertips, exploring the vein that ran up from his base to the head, then traced his head slowly. Maximus’s breathing deepened, his chest heaving. I locked gazes with him; my head tilted up while his was bent down. I loved how much taller he was than me, how solid and strong he felt. I’d even grown to appreciate the tattoos that adorned so much of his body. Maximus wasn’t a pretty man, not like those posh boy-men I saw in college. He was a rough diamond—manly attractiveness with hard edges.

I licked my lips. Maximus’s eyes slid down to my mouth, and he let out a low growl before he cupped my neck and claimed my lips for a kiss. My fingers around his cock tightened at the possessiveness the kiss exuded. I began to stroke him slowly as our kiss intensified, allowing myself to be guided by Maximus’s ragged breathing and the way his kisses grew in wildness when I touched the right spot. I loved it. I loved seeing Maximus enjoy himself. “What do you like?” I whispered between kisses.

“Rub me harder and touch my balls. But you can’t do anything wrong. Whatever feels right to you is good.” But his eyes slanted to my lips once more, and I wondered if perhaps that’s what he wanted. I was definitely curious. I paused, then began to sink to my knees. Maximus gripped my arms. “You sure?”

“No, but I want to try,” I said honestly because I had a feeling Maximus wouldn’t be mad if I told the truth.

He nodded. “Let me grab my shirt.”

I was confused. Would he put on a shirt? I was really not happy with that concept. Maximus laughed when he saw my face. I flushed but held his gaze.

He tossed the shirt on the ground in front of his feet. “I don’t want you to kneel in the dirt.”

I bit my lip, amused. “I don’t mind getting dirty.”

“There are other ways to get you dirty,” he growled, and the meaning I took from his words made my head burn. I got down to my knees, my hand wrapping around his base. His head was big, just like the rest of him. I darted my tongue out and swirled it around his head, smacking my lips together at the light saltiness I encountered. I cupped my lips around him and began to suck lightly.

Maximus grabbed my head, his fingers tangling in my hair. His gaze was on me as I experimented sucking and licking him. Eventually, I took more of him into my mouth, inch by inch until I gagged. He was too long to get his entire cock into my mouth. He felt heavy on my tongue, but it felt strangely good.

“Fuck, this feels good,” he rumbled, and I could feel the vibrations on my tongue. I hummed in reply, which made his fingers tighten in my hair.

“As good as this feels, and it feels fucking good, I really want to be inside your pussy,” Maximus rasped, tugging at my hair until I met his gaze, his tip still in my mouth. I let it glide out and gave a small nod, feeling my own core tighten at the thought of being with Maximus like that. Our sex had been incredible, and I had a feeling it would only get better.

Maximus pulled me to my feet, then gripped me by the hips and lifted me off the ground. He carried me over to a tree stump and put me down on it. Now our height difference was minimal. Maximus stepped very close and lifted one of my legs, curling it over his hips to open me up. He reached down and grabbed his cock, rubbing the tip up and down between my folds, gathering my juices. I was still very wet, so his tip was quickly coated. I moaned every time Maximus dragged his tip over my clit, sending spikes of pleasure through my body. Finally, he lined himself up, his tip parting me slowly as he increased the pressure. My walls gave in for him, allowing him entrance. He filled me up completely, answering the deep need of my body, and it felt so good. He stilled when he was all the way in, and I shuddered at the intense sensations: fullness, stretching, a low hum of intense pleasure, and the hunger for more.

Maximus’s grip on my thigh tightened as he moved back, only to push back in. I held him as he thrust into me. Nothing mattered but us, our joined bodies. Our surroundings faded to the background. I was caught up in the pleasure, the feel of Maximus filling me, of his fingers kneading my thigh, of his lips on mine.

His thrusts became harder, faster, less controlled, and I could barely stay upright, so wrapped up in the pleasure mounting high. I dug my nails into Maximus’s shoulder as my orgasm surged through me. Maximus’s body tensed, and his release followed mine with such force that I cried out in pleasure, forgetting about being caught. Maximus’s lips found mine, swallowing my moans. We shuddered, and slowly, Maximus sank down with me in his arms. He pulled me into his lap as he sat on the ground, cupping my neck and bringing our foreheads together. We stayed like that, breathing and relishing each other’s closeness. This was more than enjoying ourselves and finding pleasure in each other. I felt like we were slowly ripping down the barriers the past had built around and between us.