Eclipse Child

I loved you so hard that I softened.

-nectar

I wish I could describe in better details what happened after that.

All I can remember when looking back is pain, pain, and more pain.

And Orion being stupid Orion.

Of Grandma yelling at me and me screaming back at her. Orion looking so fragile and in that moment, me not giving a damn what he felt because of the pain.

The pain.

No one really warned me about the pain.

I’ve suffered much in my life, but this was of a different kind.

It’s hard to describe, and it’s something that can’t be conveyed, but pain had different tones. Different feelings. There are physical and emotional and mental. Each category had different levels and each level has a different standing.

I thought of all of this while I laid there screaming.

Why was I screaming?

Because of pain? Because I just needed an outlet? Because Grandma told me to?

I only really remember yelling at anyone who came in. At cursing Orion and watching him buckle under my words. Of having both me and Grandma yell at him. I wanted to laugh as I watched him shiver like he wanted nothing more in the world than to shift and watch this experience through the eyes of a wolf. But Orion, despite my harshness, had never given up on me.

His resolve was another thing I remember.

Him yelling back and startling me because of the rarity.

And then the pain.

More pain and more pain- my back on fire, my whole body feeling like it would give out until-

The pain was gone.

Nothing but a low throb.

How long had it been? Hours? I lost track of time.

But now the minutes came rushing back to me all at once as my eyes opened to a new world. A world of something more. A world that didn’t include just me, but…another piece of my soul. And his soul. Our soul. It’s one thing to watch the growth.

It’s another to see the results.

To hear the results.

The cries of the child.

The cries of Orion.

Different cries. Different tears.

Same impact.

And then I see it.

Him holding it.

I watch through bleary eyes and I know that this moment will be burned within me forever. That image of Orion, and the first flash of the future that we had created together.

“It’s a girl.”

An involuntary smile hits me at his words.

Grandma pulls up a chair, pushing it behind Orion, but he shakes his head and slowly crawls into the bed with me.

“Hey,” my voice cracks. From the rawness of screaming or just not drinking anything for so long-the emotions that I am feeling- I don’t know or care.

“Look,” I softly take her away from him, feeling the warmth. Smelling a scent carrying my own all around- yet something unique and new underneath.

I look up at Orion and laugh. We both laugh as he shakes his head and kisses my forehead.

“You already know the name,” I whisper.

I was never one for names.

Orion always was thinking and planning such things, and I knew I wouldn’t need to worry because he already had the name he wanted in his mind. And whatever Orion wanted, I wanted.

He nods and whispers to both of us, “Tala.”