novelxo Chapter 59
I watchert as Kira disappeared down the hall, the taste of her lips till lingering on mine, the warmth of her skin still lingering in my hands. Her smell still wafting up my nostrils even though she was long gone and out of sight.
I was a finished man, there were no other ways to describe it. There was no other name for what I was. I was simply: finished. Completely done for.
By physical features, no goddess of beauty could measure up to. had never in all my years seen a s*e a***s elegant as she was. The whole point of me making her a **e instead of killing her on the spot was to demean her. It was reduce her until she was no better than the dust under my shoes but my plan had backfired and had only made me realize that even at her lowest, no goddess was any match for her.
I just did not understand. I could not piece my feelings together or tell them apart. I didn’t know when this godforsaken attraction started or how it grew into this malignant tumour of affection that was conveniently beating in my chest and growing like nobody’s business.
I could not recollect at what point in the course of our co existence in this palace did me seeing her lips make me want to kiss her. Since when could 1 smell her from a million miles away? Since when did the wind move in her favour and the sun become her spotlight?
I was slowly losing my wits; it was the most plausible explanation for the number of times that she had been in my thoughts in slow motion.
I hated the b**h! Why the hell did I want to f**k her so bad? Her **was in no way close to being nicer or bigger than that of Mara but somehow the most beautiful I had ever seen.
Her ***ts were small but perky and they fit right in my hand, like they were made just for me. It was a dumb thought to have seeing as she was someone else’s before she was mine but I had those thoughts last night while I was eating her out. My hand found it’s way to her boobs and my fingers twirled around her nipples making her squirm in excitement but the moment my hand cupped her breasts, it was my turn to be excited. It felt like heaven. Just thinking about last night was giving me an erection that I didn’t ask for.
Despite every attempt to push her out of my mind, to convince myself that she was nothing more than a passing fancy, I felt her presence dig deeper and deeper into my psyche. I had allowed myself to succumb to the temptation of her body once more, and now I was trapped in a web of lust and confusion, unsure of how to get myself the hell out.
It was supposed to be a one time thing. Just like with all the other girls that I had been with but I found myself begging for more. F***sorcery she has me tied down with it but I hope that it wore off soon.
As I turned back towards my room, I was met by Mara, her eyes narrowed in suspicion. It was not the kind of drama I needed this morning.
“So, you’re saying she wasn’t here last night?” Mara asked, her voice laced with scepticism. “Because I could have sworn I smelled sex on her.”
She was right, Mara did smell like sex and the only reason I didn’t too was because I had to take a cold shower this morning. Waking up next to a naked Kira f**d with both my brain and my d**k.
1 suppressed a groan, realizing that I would have to find a way to diffuse this situation without arousing even more suspicion. “Mara,”I I said, my voice firm but gentle. “You know I would never lie to you. Kira was just here to fetch a book, as I said. You’re just being paranoid.”
Mara’s face tightened, her jaw clenching as she struggled to hold back her frustration. I was surprised that she hadn’t grabbed Kira by the hair before I got back. I had always worried for the day that Mara would find a woman in my room, not that I cared but she was way too dramatic about everything
“Well, if that’s the truth” Mara said, her voice simmering with barely-contained anger, then why have you been spending so much time with her lately?” she asked and I only realized after she said it. It was a question even I couldn’t answer. What reason ilid 1 have to spend so much time with her when I had a pack to rule?
“Say something! Mara snapped, starting to lose her patience
I bit my tongue, my mind racing for a plausible explanation. “I nothing more than work, Mara. You know how demanding my job is, and Kira has been doing nothing but her job as a maid
Mara’s eyes narrowed even further, a look of disappointment crossing her face.
“But you haven’t been spending time with me, Aston,” she said, her voice quivering with emotion.
Mara.” I said, taking a step towards her and placing my hands gently on her shoulders. “I’m sorry. I know I haven’t been the most attentive lately. But I promise you, it’s only because of work.” I lied through my f***g teeth and the words tasted like sand on my tongue. I was not used to lying because I had no one and nothing to fear. I didn’t fear Mara either so the lie was more to myself than it was to her.
Mara looked up at me, her eyes brimming with tears. “But I miss you, Aston,” she said, trying to sound sweet but failing. “I nuss the way things used to be between us,”
I pulled her into a hug, my mind still whirling as I struggled to find a way out of this situation. I needed to find the quickest way to get her out of my room so I could get a little rest. I did more f*g t**an sleeping last night.
“Mara,” I murmured, my voice soft against her ear. “I know things have been different lately. But I promise you will make it up to you. Why don’t we do sothething special this weekend? Just the two of us. ” can have a romantic dinner, go for a walk in the park. Whatever you want” If only she could see through me, she would know that I was just begging for her to leave.
Mara sniffled, her body relaxing slightly against mine. “You really mean it?” she asked, hope beginning to glimmer in her eyes as she grinned from ear to ear.
“Of course I do,” I assured het, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.
As I reassured Mara, my mind was a complete mess. I knew that I was offering her false promises, that our relationship had become strained but I needed to do what I needed to do to keep the peace in my house even if that meant lying and pretending to be interested in eating uncomfortably in a public park.
As I held her in my arms, I couldn’t help but feel a small sense of guilt, knowing that I didn’t feel the same way that I used to.
“Alright,” Mara said, pulling back to look me in the eye. “I’ll plan something special for us. And I know you’ll love it.”
With a forced smile, I kissed her cheek and bid her farewell, closing the door to my room with a sigh of relief. As I sank onto the edge of the bed, my thoughts turned once again to Kira. (Not that she ever left mind.)
I just could not understand myself anymore, I thought about going downstairs to make myself a cup of tea that was going to smack some sense into me the thought of running into Kira made me want to stay locked up in my room for the rest of the day.
Seeing her this morning was more than enough. Her messy hair, her groggy morning voice. The bags under her eyes that indicated that she didn’t get a lot of sleep. The little subtle change in her steps thanks to me pounding her until she was shaking and pleading for more. Oh, how I loved the fact that her clothes were so easy to take off!
I looked down at my pants and saw that I was going to need another cold shower. It was going to be so much longer than the first one. The thought of Kira gave me a bon**rom the one I was supposed to be mated to made me uncomfortable.
1 had so much to figure out. Right after I figured out this b**r.