Alive At Night (Wildflower Series Book 1)

THIS WEDDING WAS A roller coaster. It kept hitting me with twist after twist that I didn’t expect, and for some reason, it still felt like we were gearing up for a big drop.

The clients of Julian’s case were his friends?

Julian continued chatting with Grayson about Gabriel, the little boy I had read so much about through his endless medical reports. And the more they talked, the more my perspective began to morph.

From the outside looking in, Nessa and Grayson were a powerhouse celebrity couple. But at their core, they were concerned, loving parents who had clearly been through a lot. It didn’t escape me that Gabriel being Grayson’s son meant the star football player had also suffered a congenital heart defect his entire life. And what an impressive story that was, considering where he was now.

“Where’s the little man tonight?” Julian asked Grayson, his thumb still moving in circles on my lower back. If he seemed bothered that his friends thought we were dating, he clearly didn’t show it. He hadn’t made any attempts to let the truth be known.

“He’s with Uncle Beau,” Grayson said with a little roll of his eyes. “Getting spoiled for the weekend.”

Julian chuckled. “At least Collins can be the voice of reason, right?”

“True,” Grayson agreed without hesitation, making me think Cameron’s sister, Collins, was a lot like him. He was always our voice of reason at work, too.

We parted ways with Nessa and Grayson so they could grab drinks—nonalcoholic, it would seem—and walked to our assigned seats before I finally broke my silence.

“Why the hell didn’t you tell me?”

Julian didn’t reply, guiding me by the hand toward our table in the ballroom attached to the atrium. I wondered if I should tell him that he could probably cool it a bit with the dating act, but at the same time, I didn’t hate it. His touch was…distractingly nice.

“Julian,” I persisted.

He heard me. And he couldn’t pretend like he didn’t know what I was talking about.

Once we were both seated, he exhaled dramatically. “I was respecting Grayson’s privacy. He asked me to keep it under wraps since they haven’t announced Nessa’s pregnancy.”

I brushed that excuse aside. “He just brought it up in front of me. Clearly, he isn’t all that concerned.”

“He also thinks we’re dating,” Julian pointed out. “So now you’re part of the inner circle. If you’re important to me, you’re important to him. It’s how it works with us.”

“I noticed you didn’t correct him, though.”

Julian cleared his throat and sipped his drink before responding. “The conversation got away from me.”

There was a lull while people milled around us. The wedding tables were decorated extravagantly with piles of lavender and baby’s breath and perfectly matching linens. Across the ballroom, Nessa and Grayson were stopped by fawning fans. Not for the first time tonight, Grayson slid his hand protectively over his wife’s stomach. Watching it made something in me swell and then sink.

“If I’d known…” I began before cutting off and shaking my head, turning back to Julian. “If I’d known that this case was about your friend’s son, I would have helped you—”

“Gabriel’s actually my godson.”

I had to look away again because something was very wrong with that annoying thing inside my chest. It was aching. Hurting. And my eyes, something was wrong with them, too. They were leaking.

“Juniper.”

Julian’s voice was soft. He grabbed my chin, forcing me to meet his gaze again. Goddamnit. Maybe if Nice Julian disappeared, I’d be able to get a hold of myself. But this was almost too much.

“Why?” His brows furrowed as he flicked a tiny tear off my cheek. “I don’t understand why you’re so upset.”

“Because I feel like such a bitch,” I admitted, trying to blink the tears away. “I made you take me to that game, made you set me up with Noah, made you drive all the way to New York, and you were just trying to support your best friend. He’s probably not even an official client, is he?”

“No, he’s not. But Jun—”

“God.” I dropped my head into my hands.

Julian leaned in. I could feel it from how his breath grazed my cheek.

“You didn’t make me do anything, Daisy. You didn’t ask me to drive all the way to New York. I offered, didn’t I?”

“Because you felt obligated,” I muttered, refusing to look at him.

“Because I knew it meant a lot to you,” he said like it was a correction. Like it was the truth.

But I knew better than that.

“You can drop the nice act, Julian.”

I appreciated that he was trying. The effort he’d put into respecting my requests for the weekend was more than appreciated. But I needed the real Julian to help set the record straight because I didn’t know what was up or down, what was real or pretend.

He wasn’t here for me. That couldn’t be the truth.

“Stop hiding for a second, Rosie.”

The tenderness in Julian’s voice convinced me to drop my hands and lift my head. I hated that I fell for something so obviously not real, but I couldn’t help but listen to him when he talked to me like that.

“I’m not acting,” he said when our eyes met.

And then he didn’t look away. It must have been an illusion caused by the lighting, but his eyes were an unusual deep shade of blue, midnight sparkling in them. They warmed as he held my gaze.

I warmed.

I wanted to ask him more about what that meant. Exactly which part of this weekend hadn’t he been acting for? But then the DJ announced for everyone to take their seats, and we were interrupted by Grayson and Nessa scooting in beside us. Grayson said something to Julian about football, and their conversation quickly directed into something I easily tuned out.

Dinner was a plated affair. Decadent and delicious, but I was finding it difficult to stomach anything at the moment. I spent more time pushing it around my plate than eating it. Julian noticed; he kept shooting looks my way. Thankfully, he kept his mouth shut, though.

Once the plates were cleared and the speeches finished, I excused myself to go to the bathroom for a few moments alone and away from Julian’s scrutinizing gaze. But I didn’t make it more than thirty seconds before I heard my name being called.

Even while standing under unfavorable bathroom lighting, Nessa Elez-Everett was an extraordinarily stunning woman. It was downright intimidating.

Except her expression was…not. It was warm and full of concern.

“Hey, is everything okay?”

“Oh, I—” Biting my tongue, I questioned how to answer that. Was everything okay? “I’m just a little overwhelmed. I apologize if my silence during dinner was rude.”

“It wasn’t.” She looked appalled that I would even think that. “Julian was worried about you.”

Worried? That was a stretch. Although, Julian undoubtedly thought of me as his responsibility this weekend, and he did get a little strung up over his responsibilities.

“Look, about Julian…” I sighed. “He’s not… we’re not dating. I don’t want to give you the wrong impression.”

She blinked twice. “I don’t think I have the wrong impression.”

“Noah was going to be my date this weekend,” I said, hoping to explain that, yes, she did have the wrong impression.

Nessa tucked her brown, shoulder-length hair behind her ear, cocking her head to the side in apparent confusion. “Noah London?”

I nodded. “Something came up at the last minute, though. Julian offered to take me so I wouldn’t have to come alone.”

I decided to leave it at that, not wanting to go into how I asked him to pretend that we were in a relationship, how everything she thought she saw was a huge misrepresentation. It was fake, all of it. Telling her that would have helped her understand the truth, but this was embarrassing enough as it was.

Nessa walked toward the sink, pulling lipstick out of her bag. Then she leaned against the countertop while looking at me sideways in the mirror, seeming unconvinced. “Well, he’s worried.”

“He’s overprotective sometimes,” I reasoned. “He’s like that about everyone.”

Nessa considered that. She knew I was right; I could see it in her expression. Julian was like that with everyone.

“I had to stop him from coming into the bathroom after you,” Nessa said, shocking me.

“What?”

After reapplying her dark red lip color, Nessa grinned into the mirror before turning to face me again. She rubbed her slight baby bump, smoothing a hand over her short dress, which she’d paired with black, shimmery tights.

“He’s waiting on the other side of the door,” she said.

She appeared delighted by this fact, even though I thought it was a little mortifying. Her smile grew, and there was a touch of something in that smile I didn’t understand. Without another word, Nessa walked back out of the bathroom.

It took me another minute to follow her, needing to prepare myself for whatever was on the other side of that door.

Julian—I needed to prepare myself for Julian.

But all the preparation in the world couldn’t have readied me to see his expression as soon as I stepped back into the wedding reception.

Relief. He was relieved to see me. Possibly because he was tired of waiting, of lurking by the restroom, but possibly not. I didn’t detect any of his usual irritation as he leaned against the wall, hands in his pockets.

He pushed forward, looking me up and down as he closed the distance between us. “The DJ is calling all couples onto the dance floor.”

“We’re not a couple, Julian.”

Suddenly, I wasn’t as eager to pretend. We’d put on enough of a show in front of Sofia earlier that I was sure it didn’t matter anymore.

“You told Sofia that you’d see her on the dance floor later,” he pointed out.

“I’m sure she’s forgotten all about it.”

Did I want to spend more time getting to know my sister? Of course I did. But Julian had already done enough for me, and all of it had been unnecessary. I never should have let him come with me this weekend. It wasn’t fair to make him do anything more. I was sure the last thing he wanted to do was dance with me.

Julian stared at me, searching my face for…well, I wasn’t sure what.

“It drives me nuts that I can’t read your mind sometimes,” he eventually muttered.

“It’s not that interesting,” I promised.

“I doubt that, Lily.” His low chuckle was dry and raspy. “Come on.”

He grabbed my hand, charging back through the ballroom to the atrium doors where the chairs had been cleared, and a dance floor took up most of the moonlit space.

“Julian,” I hissed. “What the hell are you—”

With one final tug, he launched me into his arms. They circled my waist, holding me close as we found a spot between dancing couples.

“I’m dancing with my girlfriend,” he muttered. His fingers ran down my spine, similar to how they did in our office that day. “Now, loosen up, will you? This is why we practiced.”

Julian didn’t get it, did he? It didn’t matter the amount of practice we had. When he touched me, the world spun faster on its axis. And I didn’t know how to slow it down.

Julian’s determined expression told me that all I could do was hope to get through this night without letting him see how much he could affect me.

But a second later, Julian squeezed my hip, and I heard the sharp gasp that flew out of my mouth. In response, Julian made a noise that sounded like a cross between a grunt and a groan. He murmured my name with a tone I didn’t fully understand.

The world spun faster.

Yeah, I definitely wasn’t going to make it through tonight.