To Hate Adam Connor

Lucy

With every passing day, I hated Adam Connor even more; how that was even possible…don’t ask me. It had somehow started to become a passion of mine. Why? Because he was…a sly bastard, because he worked out shirtless in his backyard, because he made his son laugh, because his arms were all masculine and sexy, because his arms were peppered with hair, because there was something called forearm porn, because his voice had the ability to give you tiny orgasms, annoying tiny orgasms that forced you to cross your legs or apply some kind of sneaky pressure. I hated those orgasms; they left me unsatisfied and only reminded me that I hadn’t had sex in weeks. Weeks, I tell ya! Leave sex aside, I hadn’t even had a kiss. A freaking innocent kiss. Can you even imagine what that does to a girl? Your body reacts differently to all kinds of things.

Adam Connor being one of them.

Tingles.

Everywhere.

Long.

Short.

Painful.

Pleasure-filled tingles.

You ever had a tiny orgasm just because a guy said—no, whispered, I love you, little man, to his son while he was tucking him into bed? No? That’s just me? Well, excuse the hell out of me then. You should visit your doctor to make sure everything is all right if you don’t get the tingles when you hear Adam Connor telling his son he loves him. So yeah, Adam Connor was an asshole for making me tingle—and that’s me being frugal with my bad words.

Do you finally see where I’m coming from, or do you need me to go on with the list of why I hated Adam Connor so much?

All in all, his voice sucked. Whether he was professing his love to his little man or talking to his ex in hushed tones, his voice sucked just as much as he did.

The first day of my unexpected babysitter job didn’t suck that much, though; I hadn’t had the full effect of him at that point. I had spent most of my day glued to my phone talking to and emailing back and forth with publishing companies, trying to hammer out the best deal for Olive’s books. And you know what, as much as I’d thought I wouldn’t be any help to her, I was starting to realize that I wasn’t half bad at it. So my little green Olive was right after all. The deals that were on the table—I had four so far—were already better than what the other agents had promised to get her. So I was doing a bangin’ job at being the temporary agent.

Then around three o’clock, the big bad bodyguard dropped Aiden off and rudely told me to keep him safe and inside the perimeter of the house, as if he were trusting me to protect the president—not that I wouldn’t protect him, but he was a five-year-old kid, for God’s sake. Still, the rest of the day and the evening went smoothly. We had fun and talked about all kinds of things, from his friends at school to the girl he liked sitting with to why he didn’t like sleeping in trailers. At some point, Olive came out of her writing cave, pushing pause on the edits she was working on for her latest book and joining us for ice cream.

I wish you could’ve seen the way Aiden got all shy around Olive, giving her all kinds of looks. He was going to be a heartbreaker, that was for sure. Just like his asshole father, except Aiden wouldn’t be an asshole; he was too cute for that.

It was fun. The little human was fun, cute, and smart—everything his father wasn’t, and I was maybe a tad bit in love with him. The son. Not the father.

Definitely not the father.

Because who’d want to fall in love with a bastard who had a voice that could give you orgasms, right?

Right.

Anyway, I’d given up on love completely, hadn’t I? Better to stay away from the curse at all costs.

So, it was all great until he came to pick up a sleepy Aiden. We barely said two words to each other, but he made sure I signed his stupid NDA and told me he had a room ready for me to stay in. He said the next day I should spend my time with Aiden at their place instead of at Olive’s. I just nodded and disappeared from sight as he chatted with Jason in hushed tones, and Aiden promptly fell asleep on his shoulder.

The second day, I got a call from an unknown number as I was emailing Tom, Jason’s agent, to get his opinion on something. It was Dan the Man giving me a particularly sharp order to come next door. Ticked off because he had hung up on me before I could open my mouth, I marched over to their place, only to find he’d already left. I let it go. Barely.

Seeing Aiden’s happy face helped too. It was going to be my first day spending the night at his place and when I told him about it, Aiden seemed to be the happiest person about my sleeping arrangements because according to him, I was going to be his first sleepover, and we were going to have loads of fun.

Again, everything was perfect until Adam showed up. As he listened to his son chatter about our day, he carried the little human to bed. Thinking he wouldn’t be back any time soon, he found me just as I was climbing up the ladder I’d secured against his side of the wall earlier that day.

“What the hell are you doing?” he asked, almost startling me off the ladder.

“Singing ‘Hakuna Matata’,” I replied without looking down at him. You never look the devil in the eye. I could already feel him shaking his head in disapproval anyway. Judgy bastard. “You don’t expect me to walk in and out of the gates every time I want to go next door, do you?”

“That would be what a normal person would do.”

“Normal is boring. You’re welcome to do so. This…” Reaching the top, I straddled the wall and finally looked down at him—not his eyes, though; that was too much. “…is much faster and easier.”

“If you wanna break your neck, be my guest,” he said, crossing his arms. He looked so majestic, the ugly douche.

I gave him a big, fake smile, showing all my teeth. “How thoughtful of you. I’m touched.” As I was about to climb down, he called my name, so I looked back at him.

“At least be considerate enough to break your neck while you’re on the other side of this wall.”

I gave him the finger with a sweet smile and ignored the faint twitch of his mouth.

Just as my feet hit the ground on the other side of the wall and the stupid bush grazed my arm yet again, I heard his voice.

“If you want to sleep over here, be back in an hour or I’m activating the alarm.”

“Give me the code,” I said, raising my voice so he could hear me.

“No.”

Then I heard his retreating footsteps on the stone pathway. By the time I had climbed up to say I don’t even know what—maybe yell at him for a yet to be determined reason—he was already back in the house.

I trash-talked him to Olive the whole hour I had, had a late dinner with her and her cheeky husband, and went over the wall again.

When I knocked on the glass door, Dan let me in with a barely held back frown. I marched right into the room the last nanny had slept in and went to sleep grumbling to myself. To say that I wasn’t welcome was an understatement. He wasn’t welcome in my heart either…not that he was interested in my heart, but…

Let’s just move on.

The third day was a Wednesday, and it was a happy day. Adam wasn’t coming home from the set, and the bodyguard had actually talked to me in sentences. Exactly three sentences, but who was counting, right? I could’ve sworn I saw a smile, too, but then again maybe that was just wishful thinking. Around that time, Aiden learned that his father wasn’t coming home, and he started crying. It must’ve been my off day or something because when I saw him crying so earnestly without even making a sound, my heart broke a little, and I shed some tears with him.

So, yeah, Adam Connor not coming home…didn’t mean a happy day. It was a sad, sad day.

The fourth day was a mellow day. Olive joined us again, and I briefly mentioned the deals I’d rounded up, not going into the details. The rest of the day, I spent an awful lot of time watching SpongeBob SquarePants and making sure Aiden was smiling. Avoiding Catherine’s calls was also one of my major achievements of the day.

I fell asleep while we were watching The Lion King in the living room. When I woke up, Aiden was no longer lounging on the carpet, kicking his feet up as he kept his focus on the humongous flat screen. I was snuggled comfortably under a thin blanket that hadn’t been there when I’d first closed my eyes. Shrugging it off, I got up and went to bed. I told myself Adam Connor wasn’t thoughtful enough or kind enough to cover me up.

I didn’t see him at all that day.

It was kind of a sad day.

The jerk.

The fifth day…

The fifth day, Adeline Young, Adam’s ex, Aiden’s mom, took his son from school. Adam called me to let me know I wouldn’t have to look after him that day. He sounded angry, so I didn’t push for answers.

The sixth day, I didn’t see any of the Connor boys. I was only supposed to look after Aiden for a week, so it was my last day with him. With them.

It was…it was a…normal day, I guess.