Through The Eyes Of My Alpha

Through The Eyes Of My Alpha Chapter 68

Through the eyes of my alpha Chapter 68

RILEY. Nadia’s body was resting against mine while my arms were wrapped around her naked body as I cleaned the wounds from the new mark I gave her. I had been wanting to re-mark her when she returned, but I didn’t have the courage to ask if she wanted me to. And this moment was just perfect. I wanted Nadia to be mine again, body and soul.

“Hmmm…” She mumbled softly, resting the back of her head on my shoulder as I continued to lap and suck her neck clean.

“That was amazing…” “Did you like it?

” I asked her as I stopped licking her skin.

My hand reached for her face, tucking the stray hair behind her ear.

Her eyes were closed as she nodded her head.

“I love it.

I miss that.

I miss us.

” “Me too.

I miss us.

But I’m here now.

I’m not letting you away from my grasp again.

” She chuckled softly, her hands holding on to my arms snaked around her waist.

“You better, because maybe next time you’ll never find me again.

” “I know…” I leaned my mouth into her ear, nibbling her earlobe.

“Riley, what exactly are we doing here in the library?

Is your father’s letter here?

” My body stiffened and I felt my dick melting.

It was already slowly coming back to life as I nibbled her neck.

I guess round two was not possible at this point.

“Yes.

I almost forgot.

” I let out a sigh before leaning my back against the couch.

“Do you want me to read the letter for you?

” “Yes.

It was just probably Dad scolding me or telling me what I needed to do to be a perfect Alpha.

” I let out another sigh while Nadia remained silent.

“But I was hoping he wrote something about Zahra.

” “Shall we find out?

” She asked, tilting her head to the side to look at me.

A warm smile curled on her lips, giving me the push to do what I needed to do.

I scooped her from my lap as I stood up, placing her gently on the couch before I grabbed my shirt on the floor and helped her pull it on over her body.

I still had my shorts on and that was enough to cover me.

I went to the biggest bookshelf and crouched in front of it, taking all the books in one area before knocking the wood open, revealing an old safe.

I put in the combination I had memorized since I was a little boy before twisting the lock open.

We have many vaults around the pack house, but this one was something where my father chose to place everything important to him.

I slipped my hand in and took the letter he left me.

Not known to my people, my father took his own life by plunging his car into a ravine after he placed a shackle around his neck to avoid him from shifting into his wolf.

He was dead when we found him.

And I ordered everyone I was with at that time to keep it secret.

No one has to know that the former Alpha took his own life.

And the event only fueled my hate for my mother.

Even without saying it, I believed she was the reason he took his life.

A week before his accident, I overheard him talking to his former Beta, Dominic’s father, about how she saw my mother with her mate in one of the places he went to.

I didn’t hear the rest of it since I left immediately, not wanting to hear anything about her.

And I was sure that was what the letter was about – how despite the years, he still hadn’t forgotten her.

And that even without her knowing, she still kept breaking my father’s heart.

It was the reason I didn’t read the letter at all.

I closed the vault and stood up, taking the letter with me before handing it to Nadia.

I sat beside her and she positioned herself on my lap before she ripped the envelope carefully and pulled out the letter inside.

“Shall I read it out loud for you?

” She asked softly, and I just nodded my head, leaning my back against the couch, my coiled fists just remaining on my sides.

She took a breath before she unfolded and began reading.

Riley, my son, This letter will not be able to convey everything I want to tell you, but I will make an attempt.

There were just too many things over the years that I should have shared with you, but I didn’t.

You’re the only thing I had, and the only thing holding me back was the fear that you would realize I wasn’t any better.

I hope you know that I tried my hardest for you, to make up for being alone in raising you.

I did what I thought was best for you and for you to continue idolizing me When you read this, I might be gone already.

And I wanted you to start thinking about yourself and your future.

I want you to stop and think twice, or even a hundred times before you claim Andrea if she turns out not to be your fated mate.

Because one day, her own fated mate will come, and there’s nothing you can do to stop her from leaving you.

I know this because I lived that life.

I lived with that lie for almost all of my life.

I wasn’t proud of that.

But it gave me you, thus I never regretted it.

And I would live that lie again, because of you.

You might be confused by what I’ve written here, but I will try to explain.

Forgive me if I have to do it this way.

I don’t think I can look you in the eyes and tell you the truth.

Your mother and I were never fated mates.

But we did love each other at one point in our lives.

I claimed her and told everyone she was my fated mate, despite her refusal.

In the end, she became mine, and no one knew of our secret until she was no longer happy with me.

Until she found her mate.

Hill She decided to leave.

And I couldn’t let her take you.

Because you’re the only thing I was left with.

Without her and without you, I would be nothing.

I needed you, Riley, to keep me going.

So forgive me, my son, because I made you believe she never wanted you.

I was fearful for the day that you would choose her over me.

So I kept lying, just so I could have you for myself.

And although I was in pain from her leaving, I couldn’t find it in my heart to hate her.

I loved your mother, and I know I will love her until my last breath.

You know her name as Zahra.

But she goes by Monica Grayson now.

Here is her address.

I want you to look for her as my final wish.

Tell her I said I’m sorry.

Let her tell you the things I couldn’t tell you.

And when you hear the complete truth, I hope you will find it in your heart to forgive me.

But if you decide I am not worth your forgiveness, I would accept it.

It might be the price I have to pay for being selfish all this time.

But son, I want you to know that I love you.

And I am proud of you and what you’ve become.

“Enough,” I told Nadia to stop.

I didn’t want to hear the rest of it.

My father was not expressive of his love for me, but I knew he did love me in his own way.

And he was always there, tolerating me through all my tantrums and self-loathing.

He provided me with everything he could, except he couldn’t give me the one thing I always asked for from him when I was still a pup – a mother.

“What did Zahra tell you?

” I asked my mate as she folded the letter neatly.

“It’s better if you hear it from her.

” “I want to know.

Now.

” I stood up from the couch after I carefully placed Nadia to the side.

“Riley… Don’t be too hard on yourself.

” She stood up as she faced me while I stood in the middle of the library.

“You’ll never understand what I’m going through right now.

All my entire fucking life, he made me believe my mother was his fucking mate.

I grew resentful of all Alpha Females because, like her, I believe they are incapable of remaining loyal to their mates.

It was the fucking reason I was drawn to Andrea because she’s an Omega and for me, Omegas are way fucking better than Alpha Females.

” “Riley…” “But it still doesn’t change a thing.

She didn’t come back, did she?

She didn’t even fucking visit me.

Katya would tell me that when you wish on a full moon, the Goddess will hear it loud and clear, and if you’re a good pup, she might grant your wishes!

And I did my best to excel and be a good pup, but it was not enough!

Everything I did was not fucking enough for her to come back!

” I didn’t notice that tears were streaming down my face until I saw Nadia’s tear stricken face.

“She never came!

I waited for her through all my birthdays until I was eight, but she never came!

So whatever reason she comes up with is still bullshit.

” “Riley!

Your father rolled off an Alpha command on her…” Her voice broke, and it irritated me that she was taking her side.

“Now that Dad is gone, it is so fucking easy to say that.

She could make up stories and I would still never believe her.

” I swatted the tears off my face before I turned around and was about to walk towards the door.

“I have work to do.

I will see you later.

” “Please, don’t walk away from me.

I know it’s not my story to tell, but did you remember when you were probably 16 or 17, and you were at the neutral city?

” I stopped on my track and turned to face her, one hand on my hips while the other hand was on my mouth, pressing and cupping my lips just to stop myself from swearing more.

“She said it looked like you were with other young Alphas because of the aura surrounding your group.

And then you clutched your head and your nose started bleeding?

Did it happen?

Did you remember that?

” I swallowed hard, my forehead creasing.

How did she know about this?

Unless Darvin told her about this occasion.

Darvin, Aeon, Lucas, and I were out in the neutral city hanging out when my head was struck with too much pain and my nose started bleeding.

But it was over in an instant.

“And then, all of a sudden, the head pain stops and the bleeding stops.

” Nadia continued.

” Zahra was there.

She wanted to reach out to you, but she can’t.

Every time she comes near you, it hurts you, She told me there were other instances before that, but that was the last one.

She tried Riley.

But she couldn’t stand seeing you twitch in pain every single time she attempted to.

Nadia was talking so fast that if I was paying too much attention to her, I would miss out on everything she was saying.

“I have a meeting in twenty minutes.

I need to go.

” I went back to where she was standing and placed a soft kiss on her forehead.

“I’ll see you at dinner.

” I walked away and left her in the library.

I know I shouldn’t have, but I was lost for words.

I had to let everything sink in first or I would lose my fucking mind at the moment.

Was my father that fucking cruel to do this to me?

I thought he loved me?