The Rules of Dating

On Saturday night, I picked up Billie from the shop after work for our undate. I hadn’t told her what our plans were, but we wouldn’t have to go far because it was right upstairs.

“Where are we going?” she asked.

I tickled her side. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“I would.” She tickled me back.

“Why? You worried I’m tricking you into a date? Far from it.”

Billie poked me with her finger. “Considering you seem to be taking me back to your apartment, I am suspicious. Is Saylor at your parents’ or something?” She snapped her fingers. “Wait, is this another laundry night?”

I chuckled. “Not going to my apartment. Although, considering the mountain of clothes I have back there, another laundry night can certainly be arranged.”

“Where else could we be going?”

“You’ll find out.”

“Is it a rooftop picnic?” she asked.

“Wouldn’t that be like a date?”

“Yup. Just testing you.” She winked.

“What we’re doing is far from a rooftop picnic, my dear.”

Excitement filled her eyes. “Well, now I’m intrigued.”

I feared she might be sorely disappointed. We continued down the hall and into the elevator. I pressed the number-two button for the second floor. She leaned against the wall as the elevator rose. I stood just inches away and leaned in to take a whiff of her delicious scent, momentarily feeling like I didn’t want to share her tonight. But instead of getting her all to myself, I was about to throw her to the wolves.

The doors opened, and she followed me down the hall. When we got to Owen’s place, I knocked.

Brayden answered the door. “Hey, dude.” His mouth curved into a smile as he got a look at Billie. He hadn’t met her yet. “Who’s this?”

“This is Billie. She owns the tattoo shop downstairs. She’s joining us tonight.” I placed my hand at the small of her back. “Billie, this is Brayden—amigo number three, the one I believe you haven’t met yet.”

“Nice to meet you, Brayden.” She held out her hand.

He took it and flashed a shit-eating grin. “Likewise.”

The smell of cigar hit me as we entered the apartment. Smoke billowed in the air, and the table was all set up with cards and poker chips. I didn’t love cigars like the other guys did, but I always had one anyway if they were all smoking around me.

I spoke into Billie’s ear. “Welcome to our quarterly poker night. Tonight you’re one of the guys. Undatelike enough for you?”

She nodded. “I love poker. This is the perfect undate.”

“You play?”

“I have played, yeah.” She jabbed me in the chest with her index finger. “You scared now?”

“Excited is more like it.” I turned to Owen. “Owen, you know Billie…”

He nodded. “Good to see you.”

I noticed his eyes briefly drop to her chest. That made me want to strangle him, though I couldn’t blame him for sneaking a peek. Billie had once again decided to torment me with a corset, this time the infamous royal blue one Holden had snapped photos of when she was out with that guy. She was definitely trying to kill me, and now she was making me want to kill my friend.

In typical Owen fashion, he was still dressed in his work clothes, a crisp, collared shirt rolled up at the sleeves and black dress pants—even on Saturday. We rotated hosting the poker night, and usually Owen was the last one to show up, even if it was at his apartment, since he’s constantly working late. I was surprised to see him on time tonight. If you looked up workaholic in the dictionary, I was pretty sure you’d see a picture of Owen.

Billie took a seat next to Brayden, and I sat next to Owen across from them. She helped herself to a cigar, and Brayden reached out with a match to light it.

“We have a cigar girl in the house. I like her already,” he said.

“Thank you, sir,” she said before taking the first puff. I could definitely get used to watching her beautiful mouth wrapped around that. I took one of the cigars and lit it.

Holden emerged from the kitchen, carrying three boxes of pizza. He nodded toward Billie. “How’s it going, my friend?”

“Good, and you?” She blew out some smoke. “Long time no see. Spy on anyone interesting lately?”

“You still mad at me about that?” He laughed. “You know I love you. I was only looking out for my boy. I figured he’d be interested in knowing what you were up to, having dinner with that gigantic dude. I didn’t mean any harm.”

Did he have to point out how gigantic the dude was?

“No harm taken,” she said.

“Who was that guy anyway?” he asked.

My pulse raced as the memory of that night came flooding back. My jaw tensed around the cigar, my teeth digging into it a little too much. Still jealous as fuck, apparently.

“Eddie is a client. It was just a dinner. Not a date.”

Brayden looked between Billie and me. “Wait…back up. She was out with another guy and Holden did what?”

Billie blew out some smoke. “I thought Colby was somewhere in the bar stalking me at first. But it was Holden.”

“I was at the bar that night and texted Colby a play-by-play,” Holden explained. “Got him pretty worked up. And he made an ass of himself by texting her.”

I shrugged. “I did. Because I like her. Had no right to be jealous though, since she and I aren’t dating. Have I mentioned this is an undate?” I smiled over at her.

Owen narrowed his eyes. “I don’t know about you guys, but I’m confused.”

“You’re not the only one,” Billie cracked. “Even we’re confused about what’s going on with us.”

Owen began dealing the cards. “Colby hasn’t brought a girl around in ages. So say what you want. I’m a little suspicious of this undate thing.”

Brayden turned to Owen. “At least Colby is undating. You’re working yourself into the ground. Holden is whoring around—”

“And what are you doing?” Holden snapped.

“Me?” Brayden leaned back in his seat. “I’m just chillin’.”

Holden rolled his eyes. The funny thing was, the guys were holding back in front of Billie. Usually, it was expletive after expletive by now. All in good fun, but they were definitely keeping things PG on account of our guest.

“So, what has Colby told you about us?” Brayden asked her. “I’m shocked he had the guts to bring you here, considering we like to bust balls.”

“Actually, Holden has told me more about you guys than Colby has. He’s very talkative during our tattoo appointments.” She winked. “I know Owen is a workaholic. I know you, Brayden, are sort of a mediator among the group, never allowing anyone to stay mad at each other for too long. Holden… Well, Holden is a little wild and crazy, from my observations. And I know from Colby that you’re all very good uncles to Saylor.”

“Pretty accurate assessment.” Brayden smiled.

“You know about Ryan?” Owen asked.

The room grew silent.

“Yes.” Billie nodded. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

Owen blew out some smoke. “The reason there’s a fifth chair already set up at this table is for him.”

Her expression fell. “Oh crap. And I’m sitting in it?”

Brayden placed his hand on her shoulder. “No, no, no. It’s all good.”

“He’d be happy if you were sitting on him.” Holden laughed.

Seriously, fuckhead? I glared at him. “And here I was thinking we’d get through this night without me having to smack you.”

Holden shrugged. “Relax. It was a joke.”

I gritted my teeth. “Yeah. I got that.”

Billie looked around the table. “You guys don’t have to tread lightly around me. My best friend, Deek, never holds back. I’m used to it. I have thick skin.”

Once the game got started, much of the talking stopped. I found myself alternating between fumbling with my cards and staring at Billie’s beautiful poker face.

A few hours later, I was out of the game.

We’d reached the final betting round, and it was down to Billie and Holden. In a showdown, they each displayed their cards. Billie had the best hand with four of a kind and won.

“Well, damn,” Holden said. “Great game, everyone.”

“Congratulations, Billie,” Owen added.

Brayden laughed. “I guess that’s what happens when you bring a badass girl to poker night. She beats all of us, and we can’t even swear at the winner like we normally do because we don’t want to seem like the assholes we are.”

“Swear away. I can take it,” she said.

I walked around the table and gave her a celebratory kiss on the cheek.

“Hey, no kissing, remember?” she teased.

“Oh, yeah. Forgot…” I said as I took a long sniff of her neck.

“What the fuck?” Holden drew in his brows. “Does he always sniff you like that?”

“It’s what we do instead of kiss,” she said.

“Y’all are weird,” Holden said, getting up from his seat and heading to the bathroom.

I chuckled and took our trash to the kitchen. Owen followed.

He spoke in a low voice. “You’ve been holding out on me. What’s really going on between you and that vixen? I ain’t buying that not-dating crap.”

“Could you maybe try a little harder not to stare at her chest, so I don’t have the urge to murder my best friend?”

“Was I?” His eyes widened. “Shit. Sorry. I didn’t even realize. Maybe I need to get laid.”

I arched a brow. “What’s going on there? Dry spell?”

“Work’s been too damn busy. I haven’t gone out in ages.” He shook his head. “Wait. I see what you did there. Don’t change the subject. I asked you a question. What’s the deal with Billie?”

I sighed. “The deal with Billie is that…we seem to like each other…a lot. But she doesn’t want to date me. So we’re pretending like we’re not dating so we can spend time together.”

“So, you’re essentially dating.”

“Undating,” I corrected.

“Believe what you want.” He shook his head. “Anyway, why doesn’t she want to date you?”

“I think she’s scared. Wouldn’t you be? I mean, any woman in my life has to consider the possibility of being a mother to a child who’s not hers. That would be enough to make me run away.”

“Has she met Saylor?”

“She has. Saylor freaking adores her.”

Owen smirked. “Saylor isn’t the only one. You really like her. I can tell by the way you look at her.”

I smiled. “Remember when your dad took us on that fishing trip when we were twelve? You caught that big, beautiful bass? We were all so damn envious of you. None of us had been able to catch anything all day. That thing was wiggling like crazy to get away from you. And it won. It broke away from the hook somehow, and you lost it after all that. Remember?”

He grinned. “Yeah. I sure do.”

“Well, that bass reminds me of Billie.”

“Because she’s a great catch?”

“No.”

He crushed a pizza box. “Not seeing where you’re going with this, then.”

“I haven’t finished yet,” I said.

“Well, don’t forget what happened after I lost the bass, by the way. I caught it again.”

“Yeah. That’s getting to my point. The second time you threw it back—after all that work. We didn’t even get to take it home and eat it. So, Billie is like the bass. I want her. And she’s struggling to get away—because she wants me, too, I think, but I scare her. Ultimately, though, I’m not even sure if I’m right for her long term. So, the thought is always there that even if I did catch her, I might—”

“Throw her back in the ocean for her own good?”

“Figuratively. Yeah.” I rubbed my temples.

“Well, since we’re talking fish metaphors,” he said. “There are a lot of fish in the sea, but a bass like that is worth fighting for, if it’s what you really want.”

“I wasn’t expecting this, man. You know? I’d written off the possibility of finding someone I could connect with, at least until Saylor was older. But she just came out of nowhere.”

“Life has a way of surprising us when we least expect it. Good and bad.” He opened the garbage and put in some of the trash we’d piled on the counter. “I envy you, though.”

“Why?” I crossed my arms. “You want blue balls, too?”

“You’ve found someone you’re passionate about. I haven’t experienced that in…well, ever. I’d rather be alone than waste my time with someone I’m not that into. That’s part of why I haven’t dated a lot lately. But if you can find that passion? Shit! Don’t let it go.”

Owen worked with a lot of attractive women who were constantly throwing themselves at him. But he found that to be a turnoff. He wanted to be the chaser. And he was picky. He deserved to be.

“You’ll find her someday,” I said.

“Find who?” Brayden asked as he entered the kitchen. “If you guys don’t come back out soon, I’m gonna start flirting with that smokeshow you brought tonight, Colby. Can’t believe she kicked all our asses. I also can’t believe I never saw her downstairs before. If I had, I might’ve gotten to her first.”

He must have noticed the pissed expression on my face.

“Damn. I’m just kidding.” He shook his head. “You really like this chick.”

“I think we’ve established that,” I said.

“Does she have any friends?” Brayden asked.

“Since when have you needed help meeting people?”

“Well, there’s nothing wrong with referrals. Hot chicks like that usually have hot friends.”

“Well, the only friend I’ve met so far is a hot gay dude.”

He nodded. “She seems to have a lot of guy friends. Like the guy she was on a date with when Holden spotted her.”

“Are you looking to get smacked, Brayden?”

He laughed. “Give me some credit. I’ve had to be on my best behavior all night. Just letting it out.”

Owen whacked Brayden on the back. “We’d better go back out there. We’ve left her alone with Holden too long, which is never a good idea.”

“You know he had her fix the tattoo that’s all the way down by his groin?” I said.

Owen gaped. “What a dick.”

***

After Billie and I left Owen’s, we waited in the lobby for the car I’d called for her.

She rubbed her arms. “It was really nice getting to spend time with you and your friends.”

“They all liked hanging out with you, too.”

“I feel honored that you let me crash your tradition. Am I the only girl to ever play with you guys?”

“The very first. Yup. And the way you beat our asses, probably the last.” I ran my fingers through her long, black hair.

“You know, you’re all really lucky to have each other. I have girlfriends, but none of them really know one another. It’s cool to be part of a group—like a second family.”

“Well, we vowed to stick together after Ryan died. His death taught us not to take anything for granted, friendships included. So, yeah, we have each other’s backs. That said, I am not beyond punching one of them if they get on my nerves. I almost did that to Owen tonight when I caught him checking out your corset.”

She looked down at herself. “Whoops.”

“Why do you keep wearing them around me when I asked you not to?”

She flashed a mischievous grin. “Are you mad at me?”

“More like riled up.” I inched closer.

“I like getting a rise out of you.”

“You have no idea the rise you give me.” I tugged at the material of her corset. “I especially hate this one, though. It reminds me of the fool I made of myself while you were wearing it out on that date you’re not admitting was a date. Because that’s what you do.”

“I like you when you’re jealous,” she whispered.

“You like driving me crazy, yeah. It’s working, Billie. It’s all working.”

I leaned in and buried my face in her neck, taking advantage of my license to smell her. She threaded her fingers through my hair, and I noticed her breathing had sped up.

“Did I miss the memo that said touching like that is allowed?” I groaned against her neck. “Because your hands in my hair feel really fucking good.”

“I love your hair. It’s so thick and silky,” she said, dodging my question. “I love the way you smell, too.”

I got the notification that her car had arrived. Fuck. Hard as a rock, I reluctantly pulled away.

“Well…goodnight,” she said, a little out of breath.

“’Night.”

I watched as she sauntered away. After she was gone, I could see my reflection in the glass by the door. My hair was sticking up in all different directions. I patted it down and knew I needed to calm this dick down, too, before I faced the babysitter.

As I went up to my apartment, I knew if I was ever lucky enough to catch Billie, I wouldn’t be throwing her back in the ocean. I’d definitely be eating her for dinner instead.