Chapter 38: Bitter Disappointment
I knocked on the door, each of my nerve-endings tingling with anxiety and anticipation. Situations like this one were rare; situations in which I knew, with every fibre of my being, that I was about to make a mistake. Awful, irreversible mistake. But I couldn’t, for the life of me, walk away.
“Come in.”
The warm limelight mixed with the moonlight spilling into the room over the black carpet. The bed was unmade, grey sheets hanging carelessly over the edges, and the warm breeze came from the open window.
Leon was sitting on the sill, smoking and staring out at the forest.
I closed the door behind me, my heart pounding in my throat. I felt completely transparent in the silk nightgown, the lust charm still flowing under my skin.
He grinned at me, “Hi, Jade.”
“Hi, Leon.”
I wanted to act smug so badly, and even forced a tight smile to my lips, but walking right into his bedroom at 2AM gave my intentions away.
He raised the bottle of gin, “Want some?”
“Please.” I walked straight to the sill, anxiety sliding off me in layers. “It was a weird night.”
“Right.” Leon gave me the bottle, then ashed his cigarette through the window. “Can’t say I wasn’t expecting you.”
My first reaction was, once again, anger. I thought he was trying to prove I wanted him more than he wanted me, but I was wrong.
“Fine, I get it.” I leaned against the sill and took a sip, gin burning my tongue. “I’m sorry I walked out on you last time.”
To this, his eyebrows jumped up, “My, oh, my, never thought I’d hear you apologize.”
I let out a sharp sigh, “Don’t get too cocky.”
“Fat chance.” He took the bottle and poured gin into his mouth, the cigarette burning between his fingers.
I watched as he gulped the liquor, my nerves burning.
“Fuck, I don’t even know what I’m doing here with you.” I said, my brain screaming at me to shut up. “I thought I was way smarter than this.”
Leon chuckled, “Would you walk away if I said I thought so too?”
My eyes narrowed, “You said it.”
He pulled his knees up to his chest, took a drag, and looked out the window, “It’s the stress. We’re one second away from being obliterated and we have zero control over it. Don’t be too hard on yourself.”
A rough laugh fell off my lips, “Yeah, my nerves are making me sleep with you.”
“Jade Montgomery.” Leon looked at me, grinning, “I thought you were here to chitchat and drink gin, but I see your intentions are nefarious.”
My throat constricted. Fuck, this was such a dumb mistake. The dumbest mistake. Was I truly such a cliché? Was I truly going to do this just because I found out one single surprising thing about him?
I moved away from the sill and turned to him, “You said once that you don’t kiss and tell. Is that even remotely true?”
Leon threw the cigarette out the window, put the bottle on the sill and his legs down. The warm breeze made the strands of his black hair sway and the moonlight made his eyes appear silver.
“Do you truly think that none of your friends know exactly where you at this very moment?”
I came closer until I stood between his legs, the inner side of his thighs touching my hips. Then, I glanced up. If my friends knew where I was, his did too.
“Where is Bella?” I whispered.
“Don’t know.” He shrugged. “Where’s Thar?”
“Don’t know.”
He just stared at me, hands relaxed by his sides. I had to make the first move. He wanted me to make the first move.
Fuck, I was going to regret this so much.
I leaned forward and kissed him.
It was nothing more than a peck, an admission, an invitation. I stepped away, but left my palms on his thighs. Leon smiled, glance falling to my bare legs and dragging up the nightgown, until it finally met my eyes. He made no attempt to reach for me, which made me anxious.
“Why are you wearing this dress?” He asked.
I laughed, dragging my palms to his knees, “It’s a nightgown.”
“Why are you wearing it?”
The words somewhat stumbled off my tongue, “Because- because you walked away last night, and I wanted to prove that-”
His hands were in my hair in a second and his lips pressed against mine. Gasping, I opened my mouth and closed my eyes, surrendering to his touch. Fuck, I might want him more than I’d like to admit. Leon stumbled off the window sill, his hands leaving my hair and dropping underneath my butt. Heart trashing against my chest and heat washing over me, I let him wrap my legs around his waist.
He turned us around, putting me on the sill and settling between my legs. His teeth scraped my lower lip, eliciting a moan from the depths of my throat. His kisses were full of urgency, his touch rough and demanding on my skin. I fiddled with the remaining buttons of his beige shirt, fighting against tearing it off. I moved slightly away, just to see what the hell was I doing.
Leon’s hands fell on my bare thighs, digging into my skin. My fingers trembled as I tried to unbutton his shirt. He kissed my cheek, then my neck; hands climbing up my thighs.
“Give me a second.” I breathed, unable to see what I was doing.
“No.” He grabbed my chin and captured my lips between his teeth.
The kiss overwhelmed me; the taste of gin and smoke on his tongue once again clouded my mind and my soul. He wrapped his hands around my waist and pulled me to the edge of the sill.
He pressed himself between my legs and let my lips go, “Not one second longer.”
“Okay.” I nodded, slightly disoriented.
His hands reached for the hem of my dress and he pulled it up. The fabric wrapped around my waist, leaving my lacy panties on display. Leon grunted, his erection dragging against me. The thin lace did nothing to prevent the roughness of his touch. My toes curled. My heartbeat reverberated through my body.
Leon gripped the band of my panties and tugged at them, “Are you wearing this for me?”
“Yes.”
“That’s good.” He grabbed the fabric. “You’re gonna take it off for me, too.”
Fuck.
I realised we were on the window sill. If anyone happened to be walking through the gardens and looked up, they’d see me. They’d see us.
“Okay.” I stuttered and looked into his eyes.
I put both of my palms against the cold sill and pushed myself slightly up. Leon held my gaze as he slid the panties down my legs and over my boots. His eyes were icy, serious, and tense. Something unrecognisable shone inside as he unclasped his belt, his fingers shaky.
Heart in my mouth and need flowing through me, I reached for his pants and dragged my hand across the front, eliciting a grunt. He reached behind me and pulled me even closer to the edge.
“You sure about this?” He asked.
“Not one bit.”
His pupils dilated barely noticeably, “Say no. Say no and we’re out of here.”
Him giving me an out took me aback, but somehow doubled the tension between us. Fuck, I wanted him. To hell with everything, I wanted him. I clasped my mouth shut and stared into his eyes, waiting.
My heart thudded in my chest as he grabbed the fabric of my dress on the small of my back, pulled me in for a kiss, and dragged his fingers up the inside of my thighs. A loud, surprising moan slipped from my lips when his fingers grazed my clit.
“That’s right.” He whispered against my lips and shushed my moans right as the touch turned firmer.
My world zeroed in on the touch and tension built up in my spine. He thrust his finger inside me while I fiddled with his zipper, unable to focus on it. His teeth scraped my bottom lip. The hand on the small of my back dug into my skin. I pulled out his cock and wrapped my hand around his length. He was warm and hard and way too big for me. He grunted against my lips.
Part of me hoped for some divine intervention that would prevent this. The other part of me knew I’d just ignore it.
He kissed me hard, his tongue tasting like gin and cigarettes, and when he thrust another finger inside me and pressed his thumb against my clit, I turned into liquid.
I needed release. Freedom from boundaries. I needed to fuck it all up.
I tore myself off his lips and whispered, “Leon-”
“Someone’s impatient.”
“I think I’ve waited long enough.”
He pulled his fingers out, grinning at me, “I doubt you’ve waited longer than me.”
Growing gradually more impatient, I put my hands around his neck and pulled him closer, his cock leaning against my bare pussy. His mouth opened against mine, a grunt slipping out before I smothered it with my tongue. Everything inside me thudded. Leon dragged his cock up and down my pussy lips, leaning against my clit with each drag.
“I think you’re ready for me.” He whispered.
There was no time for gentleness. I needed him now; hard, rough and fast.
He grabbed my chin and looked into my eyes as he slid the first inch of his cock inside me. Goddess, he was so fucking hot with the strands of his hair falling over his eyes and the tip of his cock inside me. He was like something out of my dirtiest fantasies.
“Fuck, Jade.” He looked down between us, his hands sliding up my back, all the way to my shoulder blades. “You’re so beautiful right now.”
I couldn’t wait any longer. I just couldn’t. I writhed around him, allowing him to slip in another inch.
“This is such a mistake.” I moaned at the stretching sensation.
“Oh, yes.” He slid in another inch. “But it’s the sweetest kind.”
Instead of putting me out of my misery, his fingers slid between my legs again and he grazed my clit, lighting my fucking veins on fire. I shuddered against the touch.
“That’s right, baby.” He leaned his forehead against mine and looked at me, his throat bobbing, “I love- I love how you look with the tip of my cock inside you.”
My mind scrambled to the point of panic. I swallowed hard, tension twisting my gut in a knot. But Leon grabbed my chin tight and thrust completely inside me.
I winced, sharp pain spreading through my stomach. Leon cupped my cheeks and kissed me deeply, his cock beginning to move inside me without letting me fully accommodate to his size. Maybe it was a reminder not to get carried away. I wouldn’t get love from him, or gentleness. Just sex. No strings. No promises. No guarantees.
And yet, I knew, judging by the way my world unravelled, that I’d remember the feeling of him inside me forever.
I wrapped my legs around his waist, allowing him to go deeper. He grunted against my lips, pulled out, then thrust again. Something took over me; something desperate and destructive and dark. I wanted it to hurt. I wanted it to leave a mark.
His hand curled around the back of my neck, and he grabbed a handful of my hair, “That’s it, baby, you’re taking my cock so good.”
Fuck, I hated how good his words made me feel. And I loved it. I fucking loved it.
He fucked me hard; his hands gripping my flesh, cock slamming against my walls with no control, teeth biting my lips and my ear and my neck.
Still, there was a permanence in the way he touched me, like his didn’t just touch my skin, but my veins and my insides and my heart, in an aching, destructive way.
I dragged my palms over his chest and his shoulders, letting them finally tangle in his hair. He reached down between us and pressed his thumb against my clitoris, which made my breath short and my legs quiver.
The moment I felt the orgasm build inside me, Leon picked up the pace, the touch of his thumb between my legs turning firm and hard. I threw my hands around his shoulders and pulled him closer, deeper inside me. We came together hard. Our foreheads coated in sweat, our breaths ragged and warm, and our limbs intertwined.
When my orgasm finally subsided, I felt both full and hollow at the same time.
Leon pulled out and pulled up his pants.
I needed to get out of here.
I stumbled off the window sill, “Do you have a tissue or something?”
“Yes.” He walked over to the wardrobe and pulled out a towel. “Here you go.”
“Thanks.” I took the towel and wiped myself, having no idea where to put it now. “Fuck.”
Leon grabbed the pack of cigarettes, “Already regretting it?”
I raised my gaze and watched him light up a cigarette. He wouldn’t look up.
“I’m gonna go.” I swallowed the lump in my throat and put on my panties.
Grabbing my phone, I turned away from the window and headed for the door, pretending not to be bothered by his dismissal. Right. What did I expect? He got what he wanted.
“Jade, wait.”
I stopped with my hand on the door handle and faced him, “Yes?”
In four large steps he found himself before me, cupped my face and kissed me on the lips.
“Cigarette!” I mumbled against his lips, the cigarette burning between his fingers, right next to my hair.
“Sorry.” He chuckled and put his hand on my waist. “Have a drink with me.”
“No, I have a demon-hunting meeting.” I glanced up at him, ignoring the bubble of anxiety that burst inside me and flooded me with relief.
He took a step back, his smile cheeky, “When will I see you again?”
“Never!” I raised my finger, then gestured at the two of us. “This was a mistake.”
“So what?” He put the cigarette between his lips and inhaled. “You have to repeat it a few times before you’re sure it’s a mistake.”
I raised my eyebrow, “We’re a bad combination.”
“Sure, but we work.” He exhaled. “Like cigarettes and booze.”
I frowned, “You mean, it’ll kill us young?”
“Who wants to die old?”
“Bye, Leon.”
He grinned at me, “See you tomorrow, Jade.”
I rolled my eyes and opened the door, ready to leave.
“Hey, Jade.” He called again. “Thanks.”
I let out a laugh, “For sleeping with you?”
“No.” He shrugged, a small smile pulling his lips up. “The other stuff.”