Chapter 47. Being Marked
Lauren
I wake up and I am in complete darkness. Feeling the chill in my bones, I wrap my hands around myself.
“Blue?” I whisper but she doesn’t answer.
I try again but nothing happens. Searching the place in my mind where she always is, I find it empty. Where could she be? I start wondering in panic.
I survey the place. It wasn't familiar. It was dark and devoid of any life. It was desolate and cold. Could this be the afterlife? Did they finally kill me? That would have been a relief but looking at this place not that much.
I thought paradise was supposed to be full of life. Colorful flowers and lush green lands. This was the opposite of that.
I turn quickly when I sense a powerful presence behind.
"Who are you?” I ask.
The woman before me was ethereal. With floor length white hair, pale complexion and beautiful twinkling eyes that reminded me of the stars. She was truly out of this world. No words were enough to describe her.
She smiled at me and a sense of peace washed over me.
“You know who I am Lauren” she says in a silky smooth voice. It sounded like a flowing river. Cool and calming.
She was right though. Deep down I knew who she was. So with that knowledge I fall to my knees. Kneeling before her in complete surrender.
“Moon Goddess” I say in reverence.
My tears start to fall. I cant hold back the pain as it rips from me within me with violence.
To my surprise, she kneels down before pulling me into her arms.
“I never left you my child and I never will. I know it feels like that right now but know that I will always have your best interest at heart. Everything I have done, everything I will do is to ensure your happiness.” she soothes
“How can all this pain, hurt and betrayal be for my happiness? It hurts so much and I am tired of hurting” I sob.
She looks past me for a while before turning back to me.
“It will all make sense one day. For now I have given you a gift. Name her, protect her and she'll protect you. Be one with her and she will help you and Blue become the best versions of yourself. Your potential is limitless Lauren, but you have to start believing in yourself.”
She kisses me on the forehead before she stands up.
“It's time for you to go back. They're waiting for you”
I immediately start panicking. I scramble and wrap my hands around her ankles. It was disrespectful but I was desperate
"Please don't send me back. I'd rather stay in this forsaken place than go back. Don't make me go back please” I beg, crying hysterically.
She just shakes her head as she begins to fade.
"You can't stay my love. It isn't your time yet and you're needed back on earth”
She disappears and I start yelling for her to come back, but she doesn't. I collapse on the ground defeated. Why did I have to go back? I know at first I hated this place but it's better than going back to the heartbreak waiting for me.
I start feeling the ground beneath me shift. Before I can do anything I am sucked in what I can only assume is a vortex.
I scream. Feeling like my head was being split wide open. Images assault me. I see myself sleep walking. Turning into a beast, hunting, then killing. Ripping people into pieces.
I want it all to stop but it doesn't. Over and over they keep playing. Just when I think that I'll be stuck like this. It stops and soon darkness follows.
I gasp and shoot up from bed, blinking my eyes at the bright light. Was it a nightmare?
The smell of antiseptic informs me that I am in the hospital. Maybe I had a concussion or something. But then again I don't remember hitting my head.
“Red” Sebastian's voice makes me turn in his direction.
He was seated on one of the hospital chairs. The moment my eyes connect with his, everything comes crashing down on me.
Everything from my arrest. To how he watched while I was being tortured. How I pleaded for him to stop but he didn't. Finally the memories that were hidden from me.
I shut down my emotions and harden my eyes.
Without saying anything to him I get out of the bed. Ripping the drips and heart monitors.
I almost fall down once my feet touch the ground
"Be careful. You're still weak” he says rushing to me.
I don't think when he places his hands one. I just react. I snarl and swipe my hand.
“Don't fucking touch me” I grind out.
He looks at me stunned. I had clawed at his hands and it was bleeding. I didn't care though, he deserved it.
Using his surprise, I push him out of my way. He stumbles back but catches himself on time. I use anything I can get my hands on for balance as I make my way to the door. I was getting tired but I also needed to leave.
“You're barely healed, where the hell are you going?”
I don't look back at him. I was so close to getting to the door. Then I would be free. Free from him. "Anywhere far away from you, you narcissistic psychopath” I yell.
I hear him sigh but it doesn't affect my determination. I was about to reach the door when it opened. The Oracle enters but stops in her tracks.
“Lauren good to have you back. Not that I didn't want you to wake up but you've deprived me of my chance of killing some bastards” she says, throwing daggers at Sebastian.
I smile bowing in respect but she shakes her head before approaching me, taking my hand. Then she leads me back to the bed.
“No need for all that shit Lauren. We're basically equals now” she adds as she helps me get on the bed.
It's only then that I realize what she did. She brought me back when all I wanted was to get away from Sebastian.
“First thing is first” she turns to look at Sebastian while taking a seat. “What are you planning to do after she's discharged?”
Sebastian looks at me but I avert my eyes. I didn't want to see him. Nor did I want him near me. “I'll take her back to the pack. It will be for the best” He replies.
I immediately cut in.
“Sure. Take me to your pack so you can keep an eye on me. Make sure I don't kill any innocent people right?” I sarcastically ask.
He sighs. “You'll heal better surrounded by our pack member”
“You mean your pack member?” I emphasize the “your’ part.
He doesn't answer and that pisses me off more. I was angry and I was craving a fight.
"How's the arm by the way?” I ask.
“Healed"
“That's too bad.” I smirk evilly. “I should have done more damage.”
He looks at me. His brows furrowed. Sylvia doesn’t say anything. In fact, it seemed like she was enjoying this.
“You could at least act like you're sorry” he mumbles, annoyed.
"Why? Didn't you say I was a monster? I thought that monster aren“t supposed to feel remorseful” I reply
This time Sylvia burst out laughing and I smile.
"Are you done?” he asks.
I look at him. Draining every humor from my face.
“Not by a long shot Alpha Sebastian” I reply coldly, spitting his name as if it were venom.
He shuts his mouth and clenches his jaw before averting his eyes. What a coward.
“Okay that's it pups. Time to get down to business. Lauren, I am sure by now you remember everything that happened. What you don't know is that you and your beast are disconnected. I am not sure if the goddess explained everything to you but in order to be her executioner you have to be in sync with your beast” Sylvia says.
What the hell was she talking about? The goddess never said anything except that she left me a gift. "What do you mean by I am her executioner?”
She sighs before explaining everything to me. That I was to be the goddess’ executioner and enforcer. After she's done, I fall back on the pillow trying to calm down my panicking heart. This can't be real. When she said she left me with a gift I didn't think she meant the thing that lived inside me.
I saw what it did. What it was capable of. So why the hell did the goddess think I would want anything like that living inside me? And what happens to Blue. She's been quiet since I woke up. "What about Blue, What will happen to her?” I enquire worriedly.
Sylvia pats my hand. “Don’t worry. She'll still be with you. She will co-exist with the other one third part of you”
“But I don't want any of this! I don't want to be an executioner and I definitely don't want this beast inside me” I all but yell in frustration.
Why is it that no one ever considers my choice? Consider what I want instead of what they want. I am so tired of being everyone's puppet. Being used then discarded as if I was nothing but a toy. “Do you think you have a choice?” Sylvia asks, her tone hard and eyes piercing.
I deflate. Once again feeling defeated. Once again my choice was taken from me.
“Since you haven't fully integrated with your beast, the first thing we are going to do is get Sebastian to mark. His mark and wolf will ground you. Help you maintain control before all three of you can become one”
I almost jump from my bed. “Hell no. I've accepted everything but Sebastian marking me is where I draw the line. I'd rather be an uncontrolled monster than have the same bastard that watched me as I was being tortured mark me” I yell.
What she was suggesting was absurd. Who in their fucking right mind would even accept that? She pinches her nose before raising her eyes to me.
“I know you don't want this. Personally I am not a fan of this plan either but the goddess wants it done. Think about it, are you willing to risk the people you love? You saw what you did to Miranda. What happens if you lost control and did the same to Krystal or Jax, Claire, Mason?”
She uses the same reason Blue did. It makes me step back from my hate and think about them. The memories of killing those men assaults me. I push them back. I don't want to remember. I don’t want to think about how it felt when I was tearing into them. Mauling them. How their fear was like a sweet aroma.
I shake those thoughts away. Focusing on the issue at hand. “Okay then” I sigh in defeat, there was nothing to be done.
I twist in the small bed. My legs hanging on the sides. Sebastian comes and stands in front of me. His legs on either side of mine. His arm goes around my waist pulling me close. This time I don't feel the usual attraction. He managed to kill it.
He bends his head and softly grazes my neck right before his fangs sink in. The pain is excruciating. It doesn't last long though. Soon bliss takes over and once again I fall into darkness.
He may have marked me but that doesn't mean I have forgotten what he has done. Nor will I let it slide.