Tanked

Well things have taken an unexpected turn. Only once in my life prior to this cage have I experienced a comparable situation and just like most undesirable situations I end up in, it is yet again Synris’ fault. But this time, I can’t cure it with rest and medicine simply because it’s not simple anymore...

Getting my energy back didn’t take long, in fact I was fine after a day of sleeping.

But that was I don’t even know how long ago. We’ve been here for some time and although maybe some good things have come of it, I’m still rather…. Wary of the humans. Mostly when they gather in such large numbers just on the other side of the clear wall...and when the smaller ones hit at the clear wall and attempt to scream at the fish or Synris.

I got used to it though, disliked it but could tolerate it, and spending the day in the bottom of the watery cage wasn’t that bad. Synris took regular breaks to come lay with me and always insisted on pampering me. Then at nights if one of us couldn’t sleep, depending on which one of us couldn’t count enough shells, we’d either play or just lay there and cuddle. Surprisingly, I’m the one that preferred to lay and cuddle. Maybe twice he managed to talk me into a little more than cuddling......but it wasn’t the worst thing ever.

Today though I wasn’t feeling well. Somehow, I’d gotten sick or something and my stomach hurt. I was hungry when the divers brought food, but I was afraid to eat for fear I couldn’t keep it down.

“Ayrice you need to eat.” Synris sat with me and started scolding me for not eating.

“I don’t want to...” I mumbled back.

“Why not?” He asked.

“...I just don’t want to eat right now.”

“Ayrice.”

I sighed and slowly started eating. He watched as I just lamely nibbled at things before finally giving up and pulling me down to lay in the sand with him. The way he pulled me made it so I was on my stomach with my arms stretched out as he let go of my wrist and put an arm over my back, gently rubbing along my spinal knots.

“Would you feel better if I gave you a massage?” He asked softly in my ear.

“No difference........” I mumbled as he sighed and just started to massage my back, trying to soothe me despite my discouraging answer. It was a sweet attempt.

He had long ago figured out the best places to rub on and he often only rubbed there when he wanted something. But he had no hidden intentions now as he massaged my lower back and rubbed gentle circles in my sides, just trying to make me feel better. After a while he did manage to lull me into an uneasy sleep.

It was getting harder and harder for me to get to sleep and to stay asleep. A couple of days after I’d started feeling stomach pains I couldn’t even lay on my stomach. This caused a problem for me since I was uncomfortable laying any other way. Despite my best efforts I could never get comfortable in the sand if I tried laying on my sides and laying on my back made me feel exposed and too anxious to sleep.

Synris again didn’t take long to notice this but he didn’t say anything until I threw up. I hadn’t been eating so it was nothing but bile, but it was still gross. Synris was at my side faster than expected and oddly didn’t say anything... He just gently pulled me into his lap and rubbed my sides as he held me. Honestly being held like that was more comfortable than I’d been in a couple of weeks and I was in no hurry to move. I fell asleep in his arms, sleeping better than I had in what felt like weeks.

When I awoke, I was met with a nasty surprise. Instead of in Synris’ arms I was in the rehabilitation tank, the same one I’d been put in when I couldn’t eat because fish disgusted me. It was a few days of not being able to keep much down and constantly being touched by humans before they finally found something I could keep down and found out what was wrong with me.

I was horribly scared during all of this, but the little edges of sky were so nice to see too. I could stare at them and daydream of freedom in the sparing quiet moments I had.

They figured out that I had no problem keeping liquids down. So as a solution to the whole I couldn’t eat problem, they gave me a nasty liquid that made me feel full and was obviously working as I started putting weight back on easily with it. This helped a lot, but I was still vomiting from time to time.

Now what was wrong with me? Well they found out after forcing me under this terrifying machine. There was another screen thing nearby with two humans in long white material coverings in front of it. It took them all a bit to get me to lay still. As I said the machine was terrifying and I was scared, you would be too after going through so many horrible things with these creatures. Three humans had my tail pinned down and there was one on each of my arms as well, none of which helped to relax me. They had me tied with some material too, but they seemed to think I would free myself. My only comfort was I could see just a little more of the sky here. I could dream of flying while I died. Finally, when I was still they flipped the machine on. I cried with relief that it didn’t hurt. I had thought for sure they intended to kill me.

I realized then the humans sounded odd. They were all looking at the screen and then at me only to look back at the screen. One in the white body covering kneeled beside me, attempting to be calming as they gently moved my hair from my face. They kept making noises, trying to tell me something.

I let out a low whine and lamely tried to move away. The human just smiled and turned towards the screen, pointing at it as they talked to me. I didn’t understand them at all, and this was a terribly uncomfortable place to be.

I could kind of understand humans now but what this one was saying I had no idea. I looked at the screen, anyway, trying to figure out what was on it myself. I managed to move my chest a little, making my entire spine arch. That’s when I realized the screen was showing my bones. Then I realized it wasn’t focused on my bones but rather it was on the smaller bones in my stomach area under the machine. It was another moment before realization dawned on me.

That was showing my body. Inside my body… where another body was. The bones didn’t look right, still developing surely. For a moment I was too shaken by the realization I was seeing my baby inside me, but then the very fact that I was pregnant came to the forefront and I was panicking.

Before I even knew what was happening, I was back in the rehabilitation tank and alone again.

Oh, Great Gods of the Abyss what was I supposed to do!?? How would Synris react? How was I expected to raise a child in this watery hell? What was I supposed to do? I was so scared! I could no longer pretend to be blind when the very thing I had spent so much time pretending wouldn’t happen was happening.

I was crying. The pains and sleep deprivation and vomiting all made sense but I had no idea how to feel about what was causing all of it. Honestly...all of it made me wish I had a mother to turn to......but even back in the ocean I wouldn’t have had that so what was the point? I felt myself sinking back into the black trench of self-loathing...what was I supposed to do?