Shackled (The Lord Series) by Carlos

My heart sinks faster than the Titanic.

Despite trying to be good and obey them, I'm going to be punished. Only because I came. And it's not even my fault. I can't control how my body reacts around them no matter how hard I try. It's not like I want to look like a bitch in heat whenever they touch me, but I can't help it.

What is wrong with me?

Explaining this to them won't be of any help. If they want to spank me, then that's what they'll do.

The vibrator keeps buzzing inside my ass but all that pleasure I felt before it's tainted now, since I know it wasn't meant for me to finish but only for their entertainment. Stupid. I'm so fucking stupid. I hate myself so fucking much it hurts. A lump the size of Everest forms in my throat.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

Why do I keep trying to live when it's clear that anything I do ends up badly for me?

"I understand, my Lord." To my relief, my voice comes out steady. Crying will probably double my punishment. Or worse. They will drag me to the shed.

"And how many spankings do you deserve?" Mose asks.

This is always a tricky question. If I say a lower number than Mose has on his mind, then it can lead to a harsher punishment. On the other hand, if I say a higher number, that's how many spanks I'll receive while I'm made aware of what the real punishment should have been. Questions like these are only meant to make me fail.

"Thirty?" I try to guess.

Mose takes a minute to think before saying, "Beautiful, if we spank you thirty times, I doubt you'll be able to sit for a long time. How about we go with fifteen and if you haven't learned your lesson by then, we'll spank you until you do." "Yes, my Lords."

Mose has me kneel on the chair. I grip the back and bury my face in the cushion, not wanting to be heard in case I cry out in pain.

Callous fingers trace my buttcheeks. I brace myself for the pain, but the fingers continue to run up and down my skin. It soothes my fear until I realize something is really wrong with me. Else, they would not punish me for cumming. "Each one of us will spank you five times," Ansel informs me.

I nod, not trusting that my voice won't break if I try to speak right now. I have a hard time as it is holding back my tears. Even Ansel, who claims to love me, will take part in my punishment. I knew his words were not true, but to know he would deliberately hurt me stings. What did I expect in the end? That he will treat me like a freaking princess just because he can say beautiful lies? In the end, he broke my ribs. He might say he's sorry, but it doesn't mean I believe him. What the fuck is so wrong with me no one cares about me?

The guys continue to touch me. I tense up, trying to anticipate when the first blow will land. The vibrator now sends jolts of pain all over my body. Maybe that was the purpose all along. To make me suffer because I'm messed up. I mistook everything they did tonight with kindness. Because I'm not right in the head. Jason was right all along. I'm stupid. The clothes? The filly? The orgasms? It was all meant so I would break some stupid rule I was never made aware of so they could take everything they gave me away and punish me. Not because they actually give a fuck about me. But in my delusional mind I thought that maybe they liked me, even a tiny bit.

No one cares. Not about someone as broken as me.

There was this sick game I always played with Jason or Carlos. They would run a belt or a leather paddle over my body while I would try to guess when they would hit me next. If I was right more times than not, I would get ointments for the welts. Will Ansel want to play the same twisted game with me?

A pair of hands grabs my ass and spreads it apart. I concentrate on my breathing. In time, I learned that it helps keep my mind off the pain. Fingers run up and down my pussy. I grimace, wondering if they'll be brutally shoved inside me. The fingers do enter me, but they don't cause me the pain I thought they would. When they move in and out of me, I try not to concentrate on how good they feel but on my fear. More pleasure is forced on me yet I do my best to ignore it. My buttcheeks are squeezed before the first blow lands on the left one. Not by a belt or a leather paddle but by a hand. I swallow a welp of pain. It hurts, as the hand is heavy but it's not as bad as I expected. "Count, Beautiful," Mose orders me.

"One, Master," I say.

Mose grunts in approval, letting me know he likes being called Master. He hits my ass again, harder this time, pain spreading all over my buttcheek.

The fingers inside me continue to move but the jolts of pain produced by the vibrator and Mose spanking me keep me well distracted. Good, because I can't cum again. "Two, Master."

His palm hits my left buttcheek for the third time. It hurts. Not only my body but my soul is in pain as well.

"Three, Master."

Mose might not be as cruel as Jason or Carlos, but in a way, it hurts worse because, for some stupid reason, I thought Mose was not like them. That he wouldn't deliberately hurt me. He always had this peaceful expression when he was around me but looks can be deceitful.

Another spank. It lands so hard on my left buttcheek it makes me whimper.

"Four, Master."

Mose caresses my ass before smacking my ass again. This time with both hands.

"Five, Master," I cry out.

"Good girl," Mose says before kissing my back.

I'm not a good girl. If I were, I wouldn't be punished. I'm so stupid I can't even follow a simple rule. Don't cum. And what did I do? Exactly that. I deserve to be punished.

What is wrong with me? I can't stop asking myself the same question over and over again.