Chapter Chapter Forty-Five
[Jaxson’s POV]
Jace drew in a sharp breath before his eyes opened, revealing a semi-panicked state. Orion and I froze, not wanting to move or breathe too heavily. I knew from firsthand experience that Jace was more than dangerous if he panicked. I had pushed Orion down onto the bed, making sure he knew not to move until Jace knew where he was and was stable minded again.
My Twin and I were very different from the rest of our kind. Being the offspring of an Alpha and Omega True Mated Pairing, we were born with abilities not common among Wolves. However, the two of us were raised to care for all innocent life. We were only to use our power for the greater good or not at all.
I could sense Jace’s power building in the room and I was debating with myself. I needed to stay with Jace but I didn’t know if Orion could handle the literal pressure. One Mate was sending out magical pressure and the other was still fragile. I had no clue what to do.
I was shocked to see Orion’s little hand reach out to grasp Jace’s face. “Jace?” Orion asked, his little side instantly gone. Like a light switch. He was the one to decide on what to do, he had rolled over in the bed to grasp Jace’s face gently in his hands. Jace looked into Orion’s eyes, but his own eyes were searching for mine. He looked up at me, but said nothing as he looked at us. He was still regaining his focus as he took in his surroundings.
I shifted uneasily in my seat right next to them. I wanted him to at least scream at me, to throw something at my head. Just something.
“Orion, Jaxson.” he croaked out before I quickly got him some water. He drank as greedily as Orion had and that had made me concerned. I didn’t even care that he called me by my full name. He and Orion had only been out for 6hours, at least from what Hayle had told me. When he was done Jace opened his mouth, letting me pull the straw away. I was such a fool for walking away from them like I had. I had never meant to do such a stupid thing but I had just wanted to think alone.
I was about to say this all to them to tell them both how foolish I had been and how lost I was feeling. I was about to say how sorry I was for just leaving them like that but Jace spoke before I got the chance.
“Do you really love me?” he asked softly, looking at me through hooded eyes.
“With every beat of my heart.” I replied without hesitation. The same exact answer I would give to Orion if he asked me. They were my everything. They made me everything I am.
“Orion?” Jace questioned as he turned his head towards our little Mate.
“I will love you for an eternity.” Orion replied just as quickly before he began to nuzzle Jace’s soft spot. Jace chuckled, gently pushing at Orion’s shoulder, wanting him to pay attention to him. Orion lifted his head again, laying back down to snuggle against Jace’s side.
“Jaxson.” Jace whispered, he sounded so weak. He looked up at me with a tiredness in his blue green eyes. “Orion and I were hit hard by your departure. We had not been expecting you to just leave like you did. The look on your face was not one we had been expecting either. You had looked so broken. Like we were the last things on this planet you had wanted to see in that moment and then you just left. When the door closed the pain from that action hit us. Orion passed out from the pain before I even realized what was going on.” he said, his voice very soft and very uneven. It was like he was trying to punch me in the face with my mistake. I had never wanted that to happen to them. I didn’t even realize that was all they had seen. I felt so ashamed of my foolish actions. I had really hurt them beyond something I could have ever realized without ever meaning too.
They had been frozen in shock when I had left. I hadn’t realized that they hadn’t moved even after I left. “Jace, my love, I cannot begin to tell you and Orion how sorry I am for the way I handled that. I was wrong and I will regret my actions for a very long time. I never meant to hurt you or Orion. I love both of you so very much and could never see my life without either of you. I could never reject either of you.” I said my voice serious but still soft. I wanted them both to understand that while I loved them both I was still very confused by what was actually going on.
Jace’s features seemed to relax a little as he lifted his hand out for me. I quickly took his hand in both of mine, bringing it up to touch my forehead. I needed to feel more of him, but Orion had overtaken the small bed and most of Jace’s body with his small one. He was trying to get as close to Jace as he could. It was adorable as fuck.
“Jax, that’s not really the reason I had said all of that.” he said, his breathing a little ragged, getting a curious look from me. “I said all of that so, you know why Orion and I didn’t come after you because we physically couldn’t.” he added, getting Orion to peel himself off of Jace’s chest and to look up at me curiously.
“I realize that now, but I also see that I still have a lot to change in myself. I was feeling more than overwhelmed. The two of us already knew we were different from the others, but when Orion told us who and what we really are … I lost myself for a moment. I have always thought I was a freak of nature and that something was wrong with me. I have hidden a lot of myself from everyone and for good reasons. When I walked out, I was expecting you to follow after me and yell at me, Jace. When you didn’t, yeah, I had thought you didn’t care but it was because of my own boneheaded actions neither one of you couldn’t exactly come tell me what was going on. I figured you had to deal with Orion before you came after me so I had waited but then pop came to drag me back where mom beat the fuck out of my face. I love you; I will always love you. Both of you.” I said leaning forward to gently kiss Jace’s lips. The sparks of our Mate Bond running through our touch. I would never tire of that feeling.
“Can you forgive us for not thinking about that? Thinking that you would need us? We had been so shocked that it hadn’t even occurred to me that you were actually feeling lost.” Jace said, a soft whine in his voice.
I reached out to hold his face in my hand gently, this boy was definitely going to cause me to die of overload, “I will forgive you both for leaving me to fend for myself if the two of you can find it in your hearts to forgive me for leaving in the first place. I never should have left you, I should have handled everything better than I did.” I said as I looked up at them both, a pleading in my eyes. I should have thought a little better than I had and there was no way I could do things better. I had let myself walk away from my Mates and I couldn’t change that now. I could only learn from my mistakes and let them know I would never do something so stupid and foolish again.
They meant everything to me and I was never going to let anything happen to them. I was never going to make the same mistakes again. I was going to learn from this a be better from it.