Chapter 29
Walking into Serendipity’s Coffee Shop, my mouth waters as a barista walks past me with a warm cinnamon roll for a table off to my right.
I’ve lived in this city for years and I’ve never seen this quaint coffee shop before.
I love finding new places around Seattle and I can see how this one might be my new favorite stop. I’m already itching to bring my laptop down here and find a corner somewhere to write in the ambiance of this coffee house.
My eye catches on someone waving in another corner of the building.
Cammy.
The minute our eyes meet, Cammy’s smile stretches wide, and she stands out of her chair. As soon as I get to the table, we embrace in a warm hug and then take a seat.
‘I ordered you a tea. I saw the kind you had at the beach house and they make a really good blend here that’s similar,’ she says. ‘Did you find the place ok? It’s kind of tucked in here between these huge buildings.’
‘I did. The red door was a dead giveaway, and my navigation app brought me right here. I can’t believe I’ve never seen this place before since it’s only a few blocks from my apartment.’
‘Penelope says that it’s the city’s best-kept secret… but it’s not much of a secret. This place is usually booming. It’s close to the stadium so whenever I’m interning at the stadium, I walk down with some of the other girls in the office to get coffee or lunch.’
I look around to find that most tables are taken.
‘It gets busier than this? It’s hard to imagine any more people would fit in here. And who’s Penelope?’ I ask.
‘Oh, this is nothing. It’s standing room only in the mornings and at lunch,’ she says, taking a sip of her latte. A little bit of foam covers her top lip, and she licks it off. ‘Penelope is the Administrative Assistant for the General Manager of the Hawkeyes’… or actually, I guess her new title is the Assistant General Manager but she’s juggling both jobs to keep her old position open for me once I graduate. She’ll be at the game tonight. You should come with me and meet everyone!’
‘Come with you to the game tonight? Isn’t it sold out?’ I ask.
I’ve seen the banners around town about the Hawkeyes’ opening weekend.
‘Yeah, but I always have my dad’s tickets.’
My heart leaps the second she calls Seven dad, bringing Seven to the forefront of my mind again. Something I’ve been trying not to think about when I woke up this morning to find him gone, no note left behind… only the faint smell of Arctic Blue Glacier three-in-one shampoo, conditioner and body wash wafting through the air of my apartment.
‘How are you two handling everything? Did he ever call home to check on Eli? What’s going on with all of that?’
Cammy pulls her mug up to her lips and hides the devilish smile behind it.
‘If you’re so interested in how my dad’s doing, why don’t you just come with me tonight and ask him yourself?’
Even if I wanted to, I already have plans with Daniel to meet up at the bar across from his office after he gets off work tonight. We’re supposed to discuss us and honestly, after last night with Seven, I’m more confused than ever.
I’ve only seen Daniel a handful of times since we got home. Between my meetings with the publisher, editor, and PR team and his busy schedule trying to catch up with the firm’s backlog of work from having half their team gone for the last eight months, our schedules haven’t matched up.
‘I can’t. I have plans with Daniel tonight. Can I get a raincheck?’ I ask, just to be polite.
The last thing I should be doing is putting myself in a position to see Seven in his element, decked out in hockey gear.
Why is that so damn sexy?
‘Ok…I’m just going to say it,’ she says, putting her mug back down on the solid wood table. ‘Dump the idiot and date my dad.’
She leans over the table and stares back at me.
‘Cammy, I—’
‘Don’t give me some lame excuse. You already know that you two should be together—we all do.’
‘Cammy, he doesn’t do relationships. Twenty years is a long time and is evidence enough of that. I’m not going to ask him for something that he’d only be doing for me.’
Her eyebrows stitch together, and a deep frown forms, replacing the smile that’s been there since I showed up.
‘Doing it for you? Are you kidding? The man is crazy about you, don’t you see that? He’s nurtured plenty of relationships over the last twenty years without any issues. Look at his relationship with Rita, Silas, and me… and the twenty-three men on the team’s roster who he’s been friends with for years.’
‘Yes, but those aren’t romantic relationships. He hasn’t had one of those since your mom, and he hasn’t wanted one since. What happens when he makes concessions for me, and then, over the years, he resents me for it? I couldn’t live with that.’
She chews on the inside of her lip for a moment as she thinks. She’s trying to come up with a rebuttal, and as pathetic as it is, I hope she comes up with one strong enough that I can believe in, too.
‘Do you think my dad does anything he doesn’t want to?’
I think back on all the things that Seven has done for me and for others that he didn’t want to do but did anyway. He tries to act like he could care less about the people around him, but that’s not who he is. He’ll do the right thing even if it doesn’t serve him.
‘Yes,’ I say simply.
Cammy laughs. ‘Ok, yeah… he probably does, but not in this case. He wouldn’t enter into a relationship he didn’t want to be in just because you asked him to. Otherwise, he’d be back with my mom right now.’
Josslin— the reason he puts on that rough exterior is to protect himself from being taken advantage of again. I understand that more now than I ever have before.
What I wouldn’t give to see him shed that armor for me.
Maybe last night he did.
My head is reeling with what I’m going to say tonight to Daniel. I can’t agree to moving forward with him when I have feelings for Seven, can I? Is that fair to Daniel, or Seven… or me?
Cammy’s phone alarm goes off on the table.
‘Shoot, I have to get back to the stadium. I’m helping Shawny and Juliet decorate the lobby before tonight.’
‘Who are they?’ I ask.
‘Come tonight, and you can meet all the player’s girlfriends. You might as well make friends with them now; I have a feeling you’re the next add-on to the group,’ she stands before I can refute the possibility.
I shake my head, but the idea of being Seven’s girlfriend and coming to all of his home games has excitement bubbling in my belly until I remember that I can’t because I need to meet Daniel. The bubbles all disparate into instant dread and my stomach turns at the thought of having to make a decision that will end a relationship, whether that’s with Daniel or Seven… I’m still not sure.
‘I’ll leave a ticket for you at will-call… just in case,’ she winks. ‘Coffee next week? Same time, same place?’ she asks.
I nod but stare back at the wall in front of me.
What am I going to do?
Then I hear her head for the door, calling out a goodbye to the baristas as she leaves.
My phone begins to ring as I’m getting ready to leave.
Dad.
It reads.
‘Hey, Dad.’
‘Hi, honey. Your mom told me all about the good news that the publisher loved your book. That’s great news—another start to a successful series. I know this one was hard for you to write, but I’m proud of you for sticking it out. Putting the final period on things is important in life.’
I know that my dad means to say that finishing what you start is important; he’s told me that all my life, but the way he worded it this time hits differently. It’s as if he’s telling me that sometimes it’s important to end things. Like the period at the end of a book.
‘Yeah, I think you’re right. It feels good to have this book done but now I have to move on to the next.’
‘Moving on is important too,’ he says.
Lord… could he be more cryptic?
My father has an analytical mind and never speaks in riddles… until apparently today, of all days. He lives in black-and-white factual knowledge, which is why he and my brother get along so well, nerding out over science and mathematical equations. They’re the same, whereas my father and I have never quite seen eye to eye. It’s why his stamp of approval on Daniel has always meant so much to me.
‘How is everything else going?’ he asks.
‘It’s fine, I’m going to meet Daniel for drinks later tonight after he gets off work.’
‘That sounds nice. How’s the wedding planning going?’
I pull my cup to my lips, take a sip and then swallow.
‘Umm, it’s…’
I let the unspoken words linger there for too long.
‘Brynn…is everything ok? You seemed tense when we walked around the wedding venue while in Mexico.’
My dad and I rarely discuss feelings, so the fact that he’s bringing this up prompts me to ask a question.
‘When did you know mom was the one?’ I ask.
I never ask my dad sappy questions of emotion usually, but I need to know from his point of view.
I hear him chuckle on the other line as if he’s remembering the moment exactly.
‘The moment I knew your mom was the one was when I took her out on our third date. I was a poor college student with not much money and I decided to save the little I had to take her to dinner instead of put fuel in my car,’ he says. ‘Needless to say, we ran out of gas, but instead of hitchhiking to the nearest gas station, your mom pulled out a pack of crackers that she had in her purse and we sat on the side of the road for hours, snacking on crackers and talking about… well, I don’t even remember now.’
‘I’ve never heard this story,’ I tell him.
‘Yeah, well it might not have stuck out to her. But in that moment, I knew that if sitting in a broken-down car on the side of the road with a pack of crackers was the highlight of my year, that marrying your mother would be the highlight of my life.’
‘What if I don’t have that moment with Daniel?’
‘Then you need to think about whether or not he’s the one.’
‘I don’t want to let you down,’ I say.
‘Let me down? How? By not marrying Daniel? That’s absurd. I don’t even like the kid that much.’
Wait.. what?
‘What are you talking about? You’re always saying how at least if I marry him, he’ll take care of me if my author career implodes. You don’t like that I decided to be an author, and you’ve always wanted me to marry him because he has a stable career,’ I say, trying to keep my voice down.
‘That’s what you thought I meant? Why would I send you flowers for each book release if I wasn’t proud of your career and your accomplishments?’ he asks.
‘I don’t know… I—’
I hear him sigh on the other end.
‘I’m sorry if I ever let you believe that, Brynn but that’s never what I meant. I’ve always been proud of you. And I have only ever said those things about Daniel having a stable career because it’s his only positive attribute. I think the kid is a pompous, arrogant asshole, but I’ve tried to be supportive and believe that at least he’d take care of you if something happened to your career. Maybe I harped on that point too much, but it was only because I had nothing else good to say about him.’
Relief floods through me and I start laughing.
So much of the reason I wanted to make things work with Daniel was because I thought that marrying Daniel was the only way to make my father proud of me. Now that I know that he doesn’t even like Daniel, I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
It’s not the only reason I’ve been holding onto Daniel but it’s certainly one of them.
‘Really? You wouldn’t care if I didn’t marry him?’
‘Honey… I’d be relieved.’
Oh my God… I want to break out in tears.
‘Do you think I’m a terrible person for breaking up with him after he followed me to Seattle? He gave up a spot at his father’s firm to move to the west coast for me.’
‘No, Brynn, you’re not the terrible person. When he got the job at the law firm out west, he was bragging to me that he was happy he wouldn’t have to work at the mom-and-pop law firm where his father is a partner. He said that his talents were made for bigger things. He was trying to impress me. He knows I don’t like him all that much.’
‘Thanks for the call, Dad. You just helped me make a really big decision.’
‘Hey… if I make a trip out to Seattle, any chance you can get me tickets to watch your new boyfriend play?’
My ears heat at the word’s new boyfriend.
‘How did you—’
‘I saw the way Wrenley looked at you when we surprised you at Scallywag’s. He looks at you the way that I look at your mom,’ he says. ‘I don’t know all the details of what was going on between you and Daniel at the time, but for how hard he was pushing your mom to convince you to book a wedding date at the hotel, I suspected Daniel was on his way out and he was desperate to hold on.’
‘Thanks for calling dad,’ I say.
‘I’m glad I did. We should talk more. And while I have you on the phone, roses or orchids this time? My florist is asking.’
‘Surprise me,’ I say.
‘You got it, kiddo,’ he says, and then we hang up.
It’s right then when he calls me the same thing that Seven calls Cammy, that I realize that Seven and my dad are so much alike. They both have a hard time showing their feelings, but at the end of the day, they both show love in the only way they know how.
My dad sends me flowers and Seven shows it with acts of service.
I didn’t see it before, but I do now.
I get out of my rideshare a couple blocks away since traffic is a nightmare tonight.
Getting a little fresh air to think through how I’m going to start this conversation with Daniel isn’t the worst idea.
Walking up to the bar hours after getting off the phone with my dad, my heart is racing, and my palms are sweaty.
After all, giving up eight years with Daniel requires that I do this in a way that we can still be friendly towards one another.
The conversation with my father makes this breakup so much easier, though. I’ve given Daniel loyalty because of the things in our past, but I’ve always let those moments cover up all the things in our relationship that weren’t right.
A text comes through as I round the last block from the bar.
Sheridan: Have you decided what you’re going to do tonight?
Brynn: I’m going to end it.
Sheridan: Thank God! She’s come to her senses.
Sheridan: Call me tomorrow. Let me know how it went. You’re doing the right thing… just in case you’re wondering.
Brynn: I should have listened to you sooner.
Sheridan: I know
I giggle at her last text and then push my phone back into my purse.
I take the last turn on the sidewalk, and I can see the bar’s sign illuminated.
A few steps more and I begin to hear the sounds of a lover’s squabble and realize that here in a few minutes, that could be me and Daniel too, only, the closer I get, the more that the backside of the man looks a lot like Daniel.
With every step I take, the man’s voice becomes clearer, and his backside becomes more detailed.
My eyes turn to the woman to find that it’s someone I’ve met once and twice at Daniel’s office. She’s one of the younger female partners at the firm.
I’m directly across the street when I finally see the face of the man, and my stomach drops when I confirm that it is, in fact, Daniel arguing with his co-worker.
His beautiful co-worker.
What was her name?
Courtney, I think.
Their voices carry all the way over to where I’m standing.
‘So, you just used me in Australia to get a junior partner vote from me… is that it?’ She hisses.
‘That’s not what happened. We were just having a little fun.’
His explanation makes me a little sick. I know that I’m about to break up with him, but as of this morning, I was still debating us getting back together.
‘A little fun? You call fucking me for eight months just a little fun?’
‘You knew that Brynn and I were going to get back together. This was just supposed to be a short-term thing for us. Before we left Seattle, you agreed that we would use this time to get ‘us’ out of our system before I married Brynn.’
I feel the vomit rise in my throat.
‘She’s a grown woman who can’t sleep by herself in a thunderstorm. You’re practically dating a toddler. You only keep her around still because she’s a big earner…. well, so am I. I have just as nice of an apartment as she does that you haven’t minded staying in for the last three weeks while you date her on the side.’
He’s been staying with her all this time. We haven’t been exclusive, but now the reason why he’s been too busy to see me more than once a week makes a little more sense. And why he offered to stay at a ‘co-worker’s’ apartment while we work on things.
‘That’s not it. We’ve been together for too long to break up now.’
‘You were broken up, you idiot! You dumped her so you could spend eight months screwing me, and now I’m pregnant.’
A gasp breaks through my lungs at her news and then they both turn to find me still across the street.
‘Brynn!’ Daniel yells and then starts running across the asphalt, but a van drives by and almost hits him.
I start walking quicker ‘Whatever you heard, I can explain,’ he says when he finally makes it across the street and runs up behind me.
‘I think I heard it all firsthand. I don’t need you to explain anything.’
‘Brynn, please stop. I don’t love her… I love you, and we were broken up when she and I were together. You can’t hold that against me.’
My feet increase the speed. In heels, I’ll never outpace him, but I can try.
‘How about when you two were working out your little Australia vacation? Were we together when you hatched your plan to break up with me so that you could sleep with her?’
He doesn’t answer right away and now I know the truth.
He may or may not have physically cheated on me while we were together… I’d prefer not to know at this point anyway, but he was unfaithful by making plans with another woman while we were still together. The woman who was in his bed when he called and was whispering in the bathroom, was her. The time I heard her show up to her apartment to ‘work’ was all a lie.
‘Brynn, we can fix this. I don’t love her.’
I see a taxi that has its vacant sign on, and I wave it down.
It pulls quickly to the curb, and I open the door.
‘That’s inconvenient for you since it sounds like you have a baby on the way. Good luck with your life. I’ll have a moving company deliver your things to your office. Goodbye, Daniel,’ I say, and then I slip into the cab, pulling the door behind me.
‘Brynn!’ I hear him call out, but the cab is already back on route and headed for the destination I give the driver.
‘The Hawkeyes stadium, please.’