Just Like That (The Kings)

The sun was fading, but carnival lights bounced off each other and illuminated our path. Teddy was riding a sugar high from his dinner of deep-fried Oreos and a cotton candy the size of his head. He’d gotten shy when a few kids his age came up to him to say hello. The parents made introductions, and I informed them that Teddy would also be starting second grade soon. After a few minutes, the boys asked him to go on a ride together. He looked at me, and his shy smile was a dagger to my heart.

“I’ll be waiting right here,” I assured him. “Go have fun.”

Teddy grinned, and I kept an eye on him as he stood in line with his newfound friends, waiting for the Tilt-A-Whirl.

“You’re not going to go on?” Abel’s voice from behind had me turning with a smile.

I steeled my gaze and buried a laugh. “Fuck off.”

His laughter bellowed out into the night air. “Come on. It was years ago. Surely almost everyone has forgotten how you vomited all over Shelly Winters’s shoes.”

I shook my head. “First of all, it was Marlene Christmas, and I didn’t puke. I just gagged a little.”

Abel’s hand clamped down on my shoulder. “Whatever you need to tell yourself.”

He laughed again, but I wasn’t mad. Camaraderie with my siblings was still in its infancy, but it was feeling more and more natural every day.

“Sloane off with the kids?” I asked as I kept one eye on Teddy and his friends.

“Yeah,” he answered. “They’re riding the Ferris wheel, and then Sloane wants to get a reading from Hazel. I promised the twins they could get a funnel cake and ice cream.” He rocked back on his heels and I took him in. It wasn’t all that long ago that my oldest brother was an outsider—shunned by what my father had done to him and living on the fringes of our small town. Now he was a family man, and I’d never seen him happier or more at ease.

“I’m happy for you, Abel.”

My oldest brother looked at me. “Thanks. I’m happy too. Broke—because I swear these carnival rides are a total rip-off—but happy.”

I smiled at him. “You should consider what I told you. Abel’s Brewery could expand distribution. Bars are driving up demand for high-quality, small-batch breweries. You’re leaving money on the table by being stubborn.”

“Maybe.” He shrugged, then laughed. “Probably.” Abel turned his attention to me. “What about you? King Equities seems to be clawing its way out of the shithole Dad created, thanks to you.”

My jaw clenched and I crossed my arms. The tinny cadence of the carnival music was starting to grate on my nerves. The last thing I wanted to do was talk about our father, but Abel needed to know.

I kicked a patch of dirt. “Not sure how much longer I’ll be the man in charge. Apparently he’s getting out.”

Abel angled toward me, stunned. “What the fuck?”

I shook my head. “I went to see him, and according to him, he’s been offered a plea deal. I believe him.”

“Motherfucker,” Abel muttered under his breath. “When?”

“I’m not sure. I’m looking into it and doing what I can to stop it, but if a plea really has been offered by the prosecutors, it’s done.”

Everyone around us was laughing and having fun at the festival. Even locked away behind bars, my father had a knack for ruining our good time. “Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.”

Abel’s jaw clenched, but he surprised me when he pulled me into a hug. “And I’m sorry you’ve had to carry the weight of it.” Abel looked into the laughing crowd. His features darkened in a way that reminded me of the hard time he’d done behind bars. “We’ll figure it out . . . no matter what happens.”

I thumped my hand on his back and swallowed down the lump of emotions in my throat. Sharing the burden still felt unnatural. I was so used to bearing the brunt of my father’s decisions and having to be the only one to make the tough calls.

When I released Abel, a streak of red zipped past me, and I watched as the group of boys that had been with Teddy ran by and disappeared into the crowd. I looked at the exit for the ride, but didn’t see Teddy. I waited for him to appear, and when he didn’t, my heart thudded against my ribs.

“Teddy?” I called out and looked around again. “Ted?” Leaving Abel behind, I moved through the crowd in search of him. “Teddy?”

“I’ll go this way,” Abel called out, but I ignored him as my panic grew.

You knew he tended to wander.

How the fuck could you have lost him?

Hazel would never forgive me—hell, I would never forgive myself—if something happened to the kid.

I shouted through the crowd as I pushed past rowdy teens and families enjoying the carnival. My throat was raw when I called out to him again. “Teddy!”

I was drawing curious glances as murmurs grew around me. Beside me, the rides spun at dizzying speeds and my stomach churned.

I was going to be sick.

I moved forward, but a couple blocked my path. A teenage boy with long, greasy hair was leaning in toward a young girl when he said, “Want me to show you over there?”

My face twisted. Annoyed and impatient, I looked right at the girl. “Don’t do it. A real man wouldn’t sneak you off into the dark. He’d be proud to show you off.”

The girl smiled and stood taller as the kid looked at me in disbelief. “Dude . . .”

“Get out of my way.” I pushed past the kid and kept searching for Teddy.

As I moved toward another clump of people, I called out to Teddy again. They turned and the crowd parted, and I could just barely make out his crisp white shirt.

My stomach plummeted.

Teddy was standing in line for the Ferris wheel, chatting with Sloane and her twins.

I called his name and immediately scooped him up. “Jesus, you scared me!”

My voice was angrier than I’d intended, and when I set him down, worry flooded Teddy’s features.

I crouched in front of him, rubbing my hands down his arms, reminding myself that he was okay. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell. I’m not mad at you.”

His chin wobbled.

I shook my head. “Actually, I am a little mad. You can’t run off like that. But I was mostly scared.” I rubbed his arms again and pulled him into a hug. “Come here.”

I released him and he looked at me. “I saw Ben and I wanted to talk to them about the sleepover.”

Sloane held up her phone. “I texted you and Hazel as soon as I saw he was by himself.”

My hand slipped into my pocket and, sure enough, there was a text from Sloane telling us she was with Teddy near the Ferris wheel. In my panic, I hadn’t even heard the message come through and hadn’t thought to check my phone.

Relief flooded my system. “Thank you.”

Sloane smiled. “No worries. It takes a village and sometimes”—she waggled her eyebrows at Teddy—“they like to wander without telling their parents where they’re going.”

Teddy blushed and I pulled him into my side. He glanced up at me. “You’re sure you’re not mad mad?”

I squeezed his shoulders. “I’m sure.” I checked my watch. “We should get back to Hazel.” I glanced at Sloane. “Thanks again.”

Holding tightly to his hand, I led Teddy back through the carnival toward the booths. My heart still thunked against my ribs.

An endless succession of dark thoughts played on a loop in my mind.

He could have been gone.

Something could have happened to him and it would have been my fault.

I can’t lose him.

I swallowed down the bile and worry and stress. As we walked, it struck me that the concern and helpless feeling might just be a part of the territory.

Having Teddy around was a surreal feeling, mostly because it had taken only an instant. Just like that, I finally felt like I’d become a real dad.