Fang

Through it all I couldn’t help but become more and more curious about my mom. Jane couldn’t tell me much about her apart from a hand full of memories she had glimpsed in the pack mind. These memories where one of the reasons I wanted to know more.

A mountain of questions lay unanswered in my mind about her. Why had she left the safety of the pack? Why hadn’t she returned to the pack or ask LongFang to contact the pack for her? Why didn’t she trust this pack enough to keep my secret? LongFang suspected that she knew I would be different. Did she know just how different or why I would be?

I wanted desperately to ask Michael or Ian about her but didn’t want to remind them of the pain they had recently suffered and still felt from time to time after receiving confirmation of her death.

This left me with a dilemma how to find out? I tried asking the laptop one night out of desperation but it was a very inconvenient memory store seeming to only answer questions at random. I knew Jane used a thing called the internet that was an even bigger memory store but she hadn’t taught me to use it yet and I still had trouble reading, writing and typing with clumsy human paws.

To my surprise some of my answers came from one of the most unlikely sources I would have thought of. Very early one morning my Grandmother showed up unannounced and alone at our den. She hadn’t tried to speak to me alone after I had chosen to stay with Jane and I could still feel her sadness about my decision. It was for this reason I had tried avoiding her hoping not to offend her any more than I already had.

She held out an object calling it a picnic basket with a hopeful look on her human face. “Would you please join me this morning Jessie?” She asked in her sweet DenMother voice and I wouldn’t have dared refuse her request.

While she waited outside I slipped away from the slumbering Jane and changed into my human form. Michael had made both myself and Jane holes in the den wall with doors covering them calling his creation ‘our clothing cupboards’. I headed over to mine now. It used to be filled with many different clothes Grandma and Allison brought for me but after I had accumulated a knee high pile of torn shirts Jane had done ‘spring cleaning’ and threw out everything but the shorts we agreed I would have to wear. I grabbed my favourite kaki pair and set off to see what my Grandmother would want from me.

I could sense that she was unsure of our relationship. In my old pack there had never been feelings of insecurity between members and I wished to reassure her but I just didn’t know to. The humans had a different idea of respect and the way it was given compared to my old pack. I understood that she was as DenMother had been so she definitely deserved utmost respect and as it was with DenMother I presumed would not tolerate those that did not show it properly. I had made her sad I didn’t want make it her feel any worse.

“There you are.” She smiled as she noticed me exiting the den. “Come let us go for a walk just you and I.” She held out her hand to me.

I had seen this human behaviour on the ‘lap top’ and Jane had tried to explain it but it still felt awkward holding her hand. As we walked I was surprised to find she was showing me with her surface memories some of the things I had been hoping to find out.

She started by showing me some pack history and I was fascinated. Michael descended from a very old and prominent line of Werewolf pack Alpha’s. Although at times they had to prove themselves to the pack at various stages of history the line ran smoothly from father to eldest child. They had all been male up to my mother’s birth.

My Grandmother was quick to assure me that although this was unusual they would have accepted my mother as Alpha just as easily as my Grandfather. The position of Alpha had in ages past been gender specific but that had changed and there were two very well respected Werewolf packs at the moment run by capable female Alpha’s. It was simply an oddity in this pack’s history.

We had stopped next to the lake in a small clearing and she stopped with the history lesion having me help her spread a blanket under a tree and set help set out the food she had bought in the basket. At first my mood sagged seeing the tiny sandwiches that she so liked to make in a container at the top with a flask of the tea she loved to make for everyone then to my utter delight she lifted out a second container and I spied the big bag of chips and the bottle of mountain dew beneath it. My mood instantly lifted and when she opened the second container revealing a piece of raw meat she called venison she instantly became one of my all-time favourite persons.

The look on my face as she passed me the food pleased her very much and she leaned over to muss up my hair. I didn’t understand this fascination of hers with my hair but she had done it each time she saw me and for once I understood it as a form of endearment.

She couldn’t read my thoughts while I was in human form so I politely thanked her before descending on the food hungrily. I made sure to leave half of everything to share with my Jane later and though this behaviour of mine did not make sense to her she did not comment on it.

While I ate she did not instead staring at me intensely. Then she started comparing me to my mother and at first it made me feel somewhat uncomfortable then I strained my extra hearing to make sure I didn’t miss a single feeble thought.

I hadn’t seen the resemblance between my human self and my mother’s human form since I had not studied my own reflection in this form too much. I had also only recently learned that human’s tended to take after their parents a trait wolfs tended to share to a certain extend but did not really put much thought into like humans did.

I was pleased to know my Grandmother thought that I had my mother’s kind eyes. They were the same bluecolour and for the first time I saw that this was not only something I shared with her but with both Ian and Michael as well. There was one other person she compared my eyes to but this she was doing subconsciously and I didn’t try to find out who it was.

The shape of my nose and jaw reminded her more of Michael than my mom but my mouth and high cheek bones where again much like my mothers had been. I definitely had my mom’s dark brown hair and she was a little proud of that her own hair being the exact same colour.

I was delighted to learn that the similarities between myself and my mom did not stop at looks alone. We also had similar traits like the way we held our heads and the way we moved. My Grandmother thought this a little odd since these where things that were normally learned by children as they observed their parents and I had not had the opportunity to do so. Her thoughts did not linger on the impossible but simply noted it and moved on.

Her next thoughts had me completely captivated. My mother had apparently been quite a handful as a child. As the first born of a direct Alpha line she had to work hard to prove herself from a young age this did not however stop her from getting into trouble. She especially pitted herself against two younger boys who I gleaned from my Grandmothers mind was my mother’s siblings.

The images made me smile but also brought on a whole new set of questions. The boy’s in her memories where identical in every way but one that I could tell and though I deducted that the one with the incline to hummer was Ian the other boy baffled me. Too engrossed in the antics of the children I did not interrupt to ask but filed my new avenue of questions for later.

Whether she was busy getting into trouble or focused on her studies and her duties in the pack my mother seemed to excel at everything she put her mind to. I couldn’t help push out my chest a little as pride took hold, it was after all my mother. My mother possessed all the best qualities I knew a future Alpha needed and so much more.

Reminiscing about my mother this way made my Grandmother feel very sad but hers was a different in a way a more resigned kind of sadness compared to that of my Grandfather and Ian. She had accepted my mother’s death years ago when she had not returned to the pack and had harboured no hope to find her alive one day. She had mourned my mother bitterly while she watched the rest of the pack in denial feeling alone in her grief.

After her short bout of sadness she again turned to happier memories and I actually found myself enjoying this bit of alone time with my Grandmother. She was not only sharing her memories with me openly but offered to share her knowledge with me as well in a teaching capacity.

I was grateful for the offer but felt that taking her up on it would jeopardize my time with my Jane and could also make Jane think I no longer needed her. Even if I knew all there was to know of humans and the wold in general my soul would still need my Jane at my side. I could not tell her this so I would for now use my lack of knowledge to keep her close but hoped that someday I would be able to reveal my heart to her . . . someday soon.

My Grandmother was no fool and I started considering her to be on par with DenMother. She sensed my reluctance and immediately assured me she understood and let it go without further explanation on my part.

I did however concede to her teaching me how to play chest with a beautifully carved chess board she removed from the basket. Why it was not called a present basket when it held so many wonderful things I didn’t know. Like Jane my Grandmother took it slow and started first explaining a bit about the background of the game and exactly how each piece worked before even attempting to play against me. When we finally did play I was fascinated. With my Grandma’s memories to fill the background and this game to occupy our surface thoughts the time passed much quicker than I would have thought possible.

I was loath to leave Grandmother and offered to escort her to the big den when I heard Jane getting restless but she insisted on staying where she was to enjoy some more of the peace and quiet before returning.

I thanked her from the bottom of my heart grabbed the food I had left over for Jane and bound back to our den feeling somewhat appeased. I might never get all the answers I wanted where my mother was concerned but she had not left me alone in this world and for that I was immensely grateful having two families where infinitely better than none.