Faking Ms. Right: A Hot Romantic Comedy (Dirty Martini Running Club Book 1)

I was on my second cup of coffee and still didn’t feel awake. This wasn’t normal. I popped an Airborne into a glass of water and watched it fizz. Maybe I was getting sick. I hadn’t slept well. I’d been haunted by visions of a blond woman in a red dress.

Where had she come from? The woman who’d posed as my girlfriend last night could not have been my assistant. Everly was just… Everly. She was punctual, efficient, hard-working, and yes, pleasant to look at. But the woman who’d answered my summons last night had been something else.

She’d been stunning. Confident and sexy. And charming as fuck. She’d had my dad in the palm of her hand after just a few words. Her performance had been utter perfection.

I liked perfection. I demanded it, but so rarely was it achieved. But Everly in that insane red dress? She’d been perfect.

In fact, she’d turned an evening that would normally have been a drudgery into a fairly enjoyable experience.

Some of that was the look on Svetlana’s face when she’d seen who I was with. She’d remembered Everly, all right. I’d never bothered with revenge before—I was too busy for that nonsense—but Svetlana had crossed a line when she’d targeted my father. Waltzing around the ballroom with Everly on my arm had been worth every second of the hassle it had taken to get her there.

Now I just had to figure out how to break it to my dad that the woman he’d met in Hawaii was not who he thought.

There was a knock on my door and I glanced at the time. My brother, Ethan, was due to come over this morning. He understood our father better than I did. I figured he could help me determine the best course of action for the current dilemma.

Ethan looked like a slimmer version of me, with the same thick dark hair and blue eyes. He and his partner, Grant, liked to run marathons, and they both had a lean runner’s build. Ethan and I were often mistaken for twins, although he was two years older. He was a talented architect, and Grant worked as a software engineer.

“Morning,” he said with a grin when I opened the door. “Please tell me you have more coffee.”

“Sure.”

I stepped aside so he could come in and closed the door while he went straight for the kitchen.

“Sorry about last night.” He got a mug out of the cupboard and poured himself a cup. “Grant had a work thing and I really needed to be there. How did it go? Was Dad glowing?”

“You could say that.” I picked up my mug and took a sip. “His speech was good.”

“Of course it was.” He leaned against the counter and cradled the mug in his hands. “Did you talk to him much or was it the usual mingling?”

“Mingling.” Or rather, wandering around with my hand temptingly close to my assistant’s ass. And I was pretty sure she hadn’t been wearing panties. Fuck, why was I thinking about that? Ethan was eying me over his mug. “What?”

“He hasn’t talked to you yet, has he?” he asked.

“Talked to me about what?”

Ethan blew out a breath. “Dad’s having some… financial issues.”

“What sort of financial issues?”

“I don’t know all the specifics, but he had some real estate deals go bad. He lost a lot of money. And by that, I mean all his money.”

My forehead tightened. “All his money? What the hell are you talking about?”

“Well, I guess he still has some. But I’m not kidding, Shep, he took a huge hit. He sold his building to absorb some of the loss, but I’m not sure if it was enough.”

“His building? He lives there.”

“Until the deal closes,” he said. “He was hoping to work something out with the buyer, but I’m not sure if that’s going to happen.”

“What about his resorts? His other properties?”

“Like I said, I don’t know specifics. I’m assuming at this point it’s just his personal assets that are in jeopardy. Everything else is owned by the corporation. But Shep, if the board finds out about this, they could replace him.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose. “Why am I just hearing about this now?”

“Come on, you aren’t surprised he kept this from you.”

“I’m very surprised. If he’d come to me sooner, I might have been able to prevent this.”

Ethan shrugged and took a careful sip of his coffee. “You know Dad. Life’s a picnic until his pride gets involved. I’m sure he didn’t want to admit it. He probably hoped he could fix things and you’d never have to know.”

That was probably true. But he still should have told me. “Dad has more than just financial problems.”

“What’s going on?”

I shook my head because I still couldn’t quite believe it. “He met a woman on Maui a few weeks ago. He said he went to clear his head. Considering he’s apparently broke, a trip to Hawaii is a questionable choice at best, but that’s not the worst of it.”

“The worst is?”

“Her name is Svetlana Genov, and I sent her to Maui because I broke up with her.”

Ethan stared at me, open-mouthed. I kept my face blank, but it took some effort. Seeing it had been like something out of a horror movie, but somehow telling my brother was worse.

“You’re kidding, right? You suddenly developed a sense of humor and you’re trying it out on me.”

“Not kidding in the least. She was with him last night.”

“Does he know who she is?”

“No. And to answer your next few questions, yes, she knew who he was. Yes, I’m certain she’s doing it on purpose. No, I don’t know whether she’s trying to get back at me, or if she’s just that shameless of a gold-digger. Probably a combination of both. But she’s good, Ethan. She plays the part of the sweet, caring woman masterfully. I’m not surprised she’s been able to pull one on Dad.”

Ethan started laughing so hard he had to put his mug down, and he still sloshed coffee onto the counter.

I scowled, grabbing a paper towel to wipe up the mess. “I fail to see the humor in this.”

“Really? Because it’s pretty funny.”

“No, it’s not funny. It’s infuriating. And Jesus, Ethan, it’s gross. Dad’s… and I was… God, I can’t even say it.”

“Maybe they aren’t sleeping together.”

I raised an eyebrow. “If you meet her, you’ll see the improbability of that statement. Even you’d be tempted.”

It was his turn to raise an eyebrow at me. “Right.”

“I’m not kidding. At first glance, Svetlana is exquisite. It’s not until you get to know her that you realize she’s a hussy.”

“Hussy?”

I waved off his question, wondering where I’d picked up that word. “Never mind. The problem is, Svetlana is either after a way back to me, or she wants his money.”

“Well, she’s not going to get either, so what’s the problem?”

“The problem is that our father is dating my ex.”

“Right, I get it, and I’m with you, it’s cringey as hell. But honestly, what harm can she really do? Obviously, you’re not interested in her. If her plan is to get back into your life, doing it by dating Dad is just plain stupid. If you’re all she wants, she’s going to figure out her mistake pretty quickly and move on. And if it’s Dad’s money she’s after… well, he doesn’t have any, so she’s out of luck there, too.”

His logic seemed reasonable, but I still didn’t like it. “True.”

“And I take it she’s young?”

I nodded.

“Then there’s nothing to worry about. When has Dad ever had a relationship with a younger woman that lasted more than a few months? Never. He’ll get bored, or he’ll realize she’s evil. Then he’ll wallow in sorrow for a few weeks before declaring he needs a hobby. He’ll probably just take up skydiving or something.”

“Are you suggesting I not tell Dad that I was dating her?”

“He’s going through a rough patch. Let him have a little fun. Besides, how did it make you feel to realize Dad was banging your leftovers?”

I glared at him.

“Exactly. Even you had a rush of scary feelings. Dad’s soft on the inside. You know that. What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him. Trust me. I give her a few months, tops. And it’s not like we’re all getting together for Sunday family dinners. How often do you even see Dad? She’ll be gone the next time you two cross paths.”

He had a point. My schedule was always tight. I didn’t see my dad often.

“I don’t like lying to him, but you might be right.”

“Barely a lie, and one to spare his feelings,” Ethan said. “I think it’s a worthy sacrifice. A year from now we’ll get him drunk and tell him the truth and have a good laugh.”

“All right, I won’t say anything. For now.”

“Good,” Ethan said. “Because he’ll be here any minute.”

I groaned. “Did you orchestrate this?”

“It’s impossible to schedule time with you, and Dad’s been trying to get the three of us together. So I told him I’d be here this morning. And don’t tell me you have to work. It’s a Saturday.”

“I do have to work.”

Ethan rolled his eyes.

“What if he brings her?” I pinched the bridge of my nose again and there was another knock at the door.

“That must be him.” Ethan went to answer it.

My dad came in, dressed in a casual button-down shirt and gray slacks. He smiled, although there was a tiredness in his eyes that wasn’t usually there. I tried not to think about why he might be tired.

“Morning, Dad.”

“Look at this, my two sons in the same room. It’s been too long, we should do this more often.”

I got a mug out of a cupboard. “Coffee?”

“Please. Then come sit down. I need to talk to both of you.”

I brought his coffee to the table and we all took a seat. I figured he was going to confess that he’d lost money, and I wondered if it was as bad as Ethan had said.

He stared into his mug for a long moment. “Boys, I want you to know that I’m proud of both of you.”

That was an odd way to begin. Ethan and I shared a glance. What was he talking about?

“You’ve grown into fine men,” he continued. “And no matter what happens to me, I want you to know that my greatest achievement in life is the two of you.”

“Dad, Ethan told me about your financial problems,” I said, and Ethan glared at me. “I’m sure we can help you figure it out.”

“Way to be sensitive,” Ethan said.

“There’s no point in beating around the bush,” I said. “Let’s just get this out in the open so we can start working on solutions.”

“That’s not what I came here to talk to you about,” Dad said.

“It’s not?” Ethan and I asked simultaneously.

Dad shook his head. “No. My financial situation is… not ideal, that’s true, and I’ll get to that. But that’s not the main reason I’m here. Ethan, Shepherd… I have cancer.”

I stared at him, momentarily speechless. Had he just said cancer?

“Oh, Dad.” Ethan got up and moved around the table to sit next to him. He put his arm around Dad’s shoulders.

My brain switched instantly from shock to problem-solving. “What type?”

“It’s prostate cancer.”

“Do you have a treatment plan?”

“I do,” Dad said. “Radiation therapy.”

“Where are you being treated?”

“Jesus, Shep,” Ethan said. “He just said he has cancer. Can you calm down with the questions?”

“It’s all right,” Dad said. “He wants to make sure I’m receiving the best care, which I am. My doctor is at the forefront of current cancer research. And my prognosis is very good. The survival rate is close to one hundred percent.”

Ethan let out a long breath. “So you’re not dying?”

“No, it’ll take more than an angry prostate to put me down. But it did get me thinking about my life, and my priorities. I’ve spent some time getting my affairs in order. Not because I think I’m going to keel over tomorrow. But cancer makes a man face his mortality.”

“What about work?” I asked. “Are you going to tell your board?”

“Yes, I’ll be frank with them. I’ll take a short leave of absence while I’m undergoing treatment and return when I’m able.”

That was reasonable. I rubbed my chin. “We need to talk about your finances.”

Ethan leaned forward, putting his elbows on the table. “Shep—”

“It’s fine, Ethan,” Dad said. “He’s right. We do.”

“Lay it out for me. And tell me the truth.”

“I took some risks and lost my shirt,” Dad said. “The company is fine, but personally…”

I raised my eyebrows.

“I’m basically broke,” he said with a shrug. “And I have to move.”

“When?”

Dad tapped his finger on the table. He was stalling. That meant it was bad.

“Dad.”

“I have to be out this week,” he said.

I met Ethan’s eyes again and he winced. He hadn’t known either.

“This week? And you’re about to start cancer treatment?” I asked. “Dad, please tell me you’ve found a place to go. Where are you moving?”

He took a deep breath. “That’s the other thing I wanted to discuss with you. I’d planned to temporarily take up residence in one of the company’s hotels in Seattle. But I’m concerned about people’s perceptions.”

“And by that, you mean you’re trying to keep the board from finding out you pissed away your money on shit real estate deals, so you can avoid being fired from the company you founded,” I said.

Ethan shook his head. “It’s called tact, Shep.”

Dad tilted his head in acquiescence. “Yes, essentially. So I was hoping I could come stay with one of you. Just for a few months until my health recovers. Then I’ll be in a better position to find new living arrangements.”

My eyes snapped to Ethan’s. I knew exactly where this was going and I did not like it. Not one bit. But I knew what my brother was about to say. He and Grant were living in a construction zone. They’d just started a major remodel of their house on Queen Anne.

“Shep, our entire house is torn apart,” Ethan said. “We don’t even have a functioning kitchen. And it will be months before it’s finished.”

They both looked at me.

I had room. My condo was over four thousand square feet. But I had so much square footage because I liked being insulated. I did not share my personal space well.

And Dad was dating my ex-girlfriend. Would he expect to bring her here? I couldn’t have Svetlana parading around my condo. Sleeping here with my father. God, the thought of it turned my stomach.

I widened my eyes at Ethan. His jaw tightened and he gave me a very subtle shake of his head as if to say, don’t you dare tell him right now.

Fuck.

I knew I could buy him his own place—the money wasn’t an issue—but there was his sensitivity to consider. He’d probably feel like I was blowing him off. After all, he had a serious illness. I was the least emotional man I knew, but I understood my dad was different. And if he stayed here, I could keep an eye on things. Help get his financial situation under control and make sure he was getting the best medical treatment possible.

I took a deep breath. “You’ll stay here. You can have the second master suite.” At least that was at the opposite end of the condo from my bedroom.

Dad’s face broke into a wide smile. “Thank you, son. You don’t know how much I appreciate this. It’s going to make the next few months so much easier.”

“Sure, Dad.” I got up and took my mug to the kitchen. “Do you need me to arrange movers or do you have that covered?”

“I’ll take care of it,” Dad said. “Are you sure about this? Do you need to talk to your girlfriend first?”

“Girlfriend?” Ethan asked.

Dad smiled again. “I had the pleasure of meeting Shepherd’s girlfriend, Everly, last night. I wish you could have been there, Ethan. She’s lovely. I bet she keeps you on your toes, eh, son?”

I avoided Ethan’s gaze. “Yes, she does. And I’m sure she won’t mind.”

“I think she’ll get along well with Svetlana.” Dad winked at Ethan. “I met the most extraordinary woman recently. I’ve been seeing a lot of her.”

“That’s what Shep told me,” Ethan said, shooting me another don’t you dare say anything look. “I can’t wait to meet her.”

“We’ll all have dinner soon,” Dad said. “You can bring Grant, and Shepherd will bring Everly.”

Oh my god. I had to get out of here. “Now that we have things worked out, I have work to do. You two stay as long as you want.”

I left them sitting at the table and went back to my office, closing the door with a soft click.

What a nightmare. I opened my laptop and did a search on prostate cancer. Spent some time getting caught up on the disease and the latest treatments. I’d find out who his doctor was to ensure he was in fact getting the best care. Maybe go with him to his next appointment so I could get more information on his specific case. I needed to be sure he didn’t need a second opinion. Prostate cancer wasn’t usually deadly, but I didn’t want to leave anything to chance.

Leaning back in my chair, I rubbed my chin. It was disconcerting to hear my dad was ill, but at least his prognosis was good.

But there was still the problem of him moving in. Without Svetlana complicating matters, that would have been a minor inconvenience. However, she was complicating matters. I could simply choose to spend as much time away as possible while Dad was living here. But I didn’t like the idea of Svetlana having unfettered access to my home. Which meant she and I would be here together, under the same roof.

She was going to realize rather quickly that I wasn’t dating Everly.

Unless… I tipped my fingertips together beneath my chin. Unless I continued the ruse that I was dating Everly. Could I somehow make that work?

I ran a multi-billion-dollar corporation. I made complicated business deals every day. I was sure I could come to an arrangement with my assistant. It was only for a few months.

And Everly was perfect.