Don’t Cry Baby

After studying for hours sitting at my little desk in the corner of my bedroom I decide to get up and go take a quick shower. Longing for the hot water to ease my aching body. When I get out I stare at myself in the mirror. Bruises are evident all over, dark purple bruises down my ribs the bruise on my jaw that refuses to fade and a new bruise on my thigh from today. I guess he was holding it pretty hard. I hadn't even noticed.

I walk into my room and quickly get dressed in a tank top and panties. It's too hot in my house to really wear anything else. I climb into bed and finally get comfortable when I hear a tap at my window. Ty came back? Maybe he's come to apologize. I walk towards the window and slide it open, only the man that stands beside my house is not Ty but Damien. I smile and he waves climbing up the tree and into my room. "I'm so sorry about Ty he was such an asshole, and I left the other day after you kissed me I've been such a total dick.." Damien stops my rambling by bring me close and kissing me. His lips brush mine ever so softly and his hands rest at the base of my neck.

"He hurts you doesn't he." He looks at me with sad eyes. I look down at my feet not wanting to answer. Damien grabs my chin gently not wanting to hurt my bruises and lifts my face up so I'm looking at him. Tears well up in my eyes and Damien pulls me into his chest. I let it out, I let it all out. The pain, the fear, the hurt. Damien holds me clutches me tight against his chest, me standing hear in my underwear doesn't even seem to phase him. He pulls back takes my hand and we climb into the bed. He holds me close cuddling me. I feel safe and protected and warm. Damien's strong arms wrapped right around me gently not rough. He kisses my temple as my eyes flutter closed sleep taking over. But not before I hear him whisper...

"I'll keep you safe."

******************************

Another tap at my window jolts me awake, I feel restricted as I notice Damien's arms are still firmly wrapped around me. I feel

The panic begin to rise like bile. I know who that tap is and it's not good. I lift Damien's arm off me and clamber out of bed. I slap Damien awake. He jumps up eyes wide.

"I'm sorry, fuck but Ty is here and you need to like hide or something please please hide." Damien jumps out of bed and runs towards my closet. Opening it and climbing inside hiding behind the mountains of clothes and shit I have packed in there. I really should clean that out.

I walk towards the window and open it up, smiling up at me is Ty. He climbs up and in through the window giving me a peck on the lips and slapping my ass.

"What are you doing here at 2 am." I whisper

"I missed you I wanted to see you." I smile and kiss him on the cheek.

"You have to go Ty, I love you and I'm glad you're hear but if my parents catch you we'll be in shit." Ty frowns but nods.

"Okay baby doll anything for you." He kisses me and says goodbye while climbing back out the window. I watch him walk across the street and down towards his house. Once he walks into his house I let out a breath of relief. I turn around and walk towards the closet.

"Fuck that was close." We both let out breath we didn't know we were holding in.

"Well you should go too it's pretty late." Damien nods and gives me a hug before clambering out my bedroom window. My god if Ty had found out that Damien was here I don't even wanna know what would have happened. I walk sluggishly towards my bed and climb in. Curling up to fall asleep, it feels so strange now that Damien's not in the bed with me. Not as warm not as relaxing. I let my eyes flutter closed.

**************************

I walk to school with a smile the next morning, I'm glad everything with Damien is fixed. School without him seriously sucks. I walk in through the ugly blue metal doors at the front office, smile at the office lady. I've been going to this school for years and I still don't even know her name. Why they don't wear name tags in there I do not know. My first class is English and it's my favourite. I walk in and stop dead in my tracks. Sitting in his usual spot is Damien. He looks over at me and tears well up in my eyes. His left eye is almost swollen shut, his lip is swollen and cut, there's a large bruise on his right cheek. I lift my hand towards my lips and walk towards him. My hand caresses his left cheek as a tear escapes and falls down my cheek.

"What happened." I whisper.

"I kept you safe."

I caress his face, the bruises are so dark. I don't even care if I'm sitting in front of my whole class right now, tears streaming down my face. All I can think about is that I did this. This is my fault, he's hurt because of me.

I stand up and run out of the class. I run out into the hall and almost run into the guidance councillor on her way into Mr.Jekylls classroom.

She is probably going to talk to Damien about his injuries. She calls out to me but I don't hear her, my heart is beating so hard I can hear it in my ears. It's like I'm underwater I feel like I'm moving slower almost like water is holding me back. My converse hit the floor with a loud smack every step I take.

I run out the school doors, I don't have a destination I just keep running. I run until I can't breathe. I run straight to his house and I stand outside on the porch. I bend over trying to catch my breath, he won't even be home right now. He shouldn't be home, he should be at work. I stare up at the White House in front of me. Windows dressed in Brown framework. It doesn't have a porch like my house just a small set of stares up to the bright red door. Tyler's Mom likes statement pieces and she loved the idea of a bright red door.

They're grass never grows in very nicely, it is always a little brown and patchy. There's a small bush in the front yard full of berries, but no one ever goes near the berries in this yard. Tyler's family has a reputation, his fathers in jail. Tyler never talks about it but his father is in jail because of drug related issues. Tyler visits his dad often, as often as he can. I take a seat on the small set of stairs in front of his house and wait for him to come home. I don't know why I decided to come here, I don't know what I'm going to say when he gets home. All I know is that I am not happy. He doesn't get to hurt people I care about. Hurting me is one thing but, hurting someone in my life who cares for me and stands by me is not okay.

**

I sit on these steps for what feels like hours before I see him driving up the street. My hands begin to sweat and I wipe them off on my jeans. I take a deep breath trying to calm myself before the storm. He parks his car in his usual parking spot on the street and climbs out. He sees me and a smile spreads across his face. He doesn't think I know good.

"Hey baby doll, you're home early." I don't respond and his smile turns swiftly into a frown. His brows scrunch together and his pupils dilate. I walk towards him, trying to catch my breath and find the words I need to say.

"I know what you did Tyler."

"I have no idea what you are talking about Ashley."

"To Damien, you knew he was there last night didn't you. You hurt him, to hurt me."

"I didn't know he was there actually, I saw him hanging around your house and I didn't like that. You are mine and no one else's."

"Actually Tyler, I am my own damn person. I'm not your property, I'm your girlfriend. Maybe I'm not even that anymore."

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean."

"It means that you can't treat me like this, you can't treat people I care about like that. We're supposed to be partners, you don't own me" a growl escapes his lips and he steps forward closing the distance between us. He grabs the back of my head clenching my hair between his fingers so hard it pulls at my scalp. I whimper and he forces me to meet his fiery gaze.

"Who gave you the right to speak to me like that bitch."

"W-watch it Tyler, someone might see you hurting me." He lets go and steps back, staring at me icily. "I can't do this with you anymore Ty, we need to take a break."

"Baby doll no,I can do better don't give up on me." He goes from icy to pained in less then five seconds. Completely changing from the angry possessive man who stood in front of me to this pathetic, sad boy kneeling at my feet.

"I can't let you hurt me or the people I care about any longer." I turn around and run towards my house, not letting myself cry where he can see. I ignore his pleading, I ignore his screams from across the road as I walk into my house and slam the door locking it. I run up the stairs of my house and straight to my room shutting the door. Thankful that my parents aren't home

I finally let the tears fall. I climb into bed clutching a pillow between my legs and in my arms. I cry until my throat is hoarse and my eyes burn, I cry so much I don't think I have any tears left.

After awhile I feel numb, my body feels numb my mind feels drained. I ended it, I am free from him. It doesn't feel over, the fear is still there. I feel bare almost naked, completely vulnerable. He gets to me, he hurts me so deeply yet makes me feel so many incredible emotions at the same time. We could have worked through his anger towards me but, I can't let other people get hurt because of me. I can't let other people pay for my mistakes. I sit up with my back against my head board. I stare at the wall ahead of me feeling completely broken inside. My stomach churns and my heart aches. A knock brings me out of my thoughts and I turn towards the door as it opens every fibre of my body on edge.

"Hey sweetie, oh baby what's wrong." My dad walks towards my bed and caresses my cheek. I'm thanking the gods the bruises on my face have healed to almost none existent, I don't know how I would explain those to my dad.

"We broke up." My voice shakes and my lip quivers, despite my fathers hatred for Ty he gives me a sympathetic look and pulls me into his chest. He rubs my back trying to soothe me and it does work. Having my dad here makes me feel better, safer.

"Baby there's gonna be lots more guys, better guys who will make you feel like a genuine queen. You have many more years to find someone special, he will definitely not be the only one baby girl. You are a beautiful woman just like your mom." I feel the tears coming back as I listen to the beautiful words from my dad. He continues to hold me until I've calmed down and pulls back to smile at me.

"What did you wanna tell me when you came in here?"

"Oh I just wanted to say that supper is ready, are you hungry?"

"Could you save some for me, I'm not really hungry I was thinking of taking a nice warm shower." My dad nods and smiles before leaving my room. My dad has always been such a wonderful man in my life. He always try's to lift me up and make me feel special. I hope I find someone like him one day.

Tyler was never that guy and I was fooling myself thinking he could be. I should tell my dad everything that he did. I really should, maybe my dad could help me, keep me safe. I don't know how to talk about it, or tell anyone about it. I let him hurt me. I let him do that to me over and over again. He broke me time and time again and I let him walk all over me. I refuse to do that any longer. I refuse to let him back in.

Tap tap sounds at my window and my whole body clenches. I hold my breath as I walk towards the window to look down. I smile as I see who's waiting for me to open and allow them entrance into my home. I swiftly pull the window open and he climbs up the tree and inside. Landing softly onto my wood floors.

"It's not as bad as it looks honestly, when you left English everyone literally flipped shit." I chuckle and give Damien the biggest hug. His arms wrap tightly around me.

"Thank you so much Damien." I feel the tears prick at my eyes, I blink them away and rest my head on his shoulder.

"You helped me when I first moved here, you were nothing but kind despite everything you were going through. I will always be there for you, cuts and bruises won't scare me away. I'm not going anywhere."

**☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐