novelxo Chapter 37: 37) Opening up a little.
Authors pov
It was 5 in the morning when I lazily opened my eyes. It has became a habit of mine to wake up at this hour for practice. When I tried to get up i saw Damian's hand clutching my waist. I turned around in his tight possessive hold and looked at his peacefull sleeping face, whenever I see this man my heart fills with love. The face of my dreams, this man never failed to come and visit me in my dreams and never failed to make my heart flutter. Even if I was away from him for years I never forgot his devilishly handsome face, his dominating yet gentle voice, his childish behaviour. He hadn't changed a bit. He is still like a little stubborn child and I always admired it.
You are my life dami, I thought I will protect you by staying away from you but looks like fate has something else planned for us. When Renzo showed me your file regarding bodyguard job I was the happiest person on this earth. I was dying to see your face in real life, I wanted to see how much you have grown up, how you behaved now. I was curious to know if power and responsibilities has changed you or not ?...
Yes, I have been your shadow before but still I never got the chance to satisfy my eyes with your mere look.
I can't describe in words how I felt when I saw you for the first time after years which felt like thousands of centuries. My heart swelled with pride when I saw you sitting on the chair like the King. You have no idea how much I controlled myself from throwing my body in your arms and satisfy the crave feeling of your warmness against my body. No matter how much I wanted it I couldn't. I was bound in thousands of invisible chains which I couldn't break no matter how much I tried.
Whenever Roy attacked you I felt like he was striking on my heart every time. Watching you in danger was like a slow poison to me, I used to get worried day and night to know if you were safe or not. It felt like I will divert my attention from you and someone will take you away from me.
My hands couldn't control the itching to touch and cherish his beautiful tanned skin, how can someone be so perfect. My eyes roamed on his perfectly carved face and it looked like god has taken all his time to create this beautiful creature. His little natural reddish lips, slightly parted while snoring lightly. I can't understand why my feelings are this strong for him, I can't see anyone looking at him with wicked eye, my inside boils like an active volcano until I finish that person.
When he touched me for the first time he set my whole body on fire. The desire for this unfamiliar pleasure and my starvation for this forbidden touch was too much to handle. I was happy that I gave myself to the person whom I always Loved and cherished. He provided a weird sense of peace and happiness to me when he clinched to me for the first time like a Koala. Never in all these years I thought I will see dami again or even catch a glimpse of him. My fate has never been this kind to me, maybe it decided to give me a break and show some mercy on me.
I thought it was only me who is crazy for him but when he said those words to me yesterday I felt like i was floating in heaven. This is the first time I realised how it feels when someone claims you with full rights, how does it feel to be wanted, how does it feel to be loved. I don't want to leave him now, I can't stay away from him, he has made me addicted to him, I don't want to loose him once again.
I wrapped my arms around his torso and snuggled closer to his warm body. My whole body is sore and every muscle is screaming in delicious pain which I don't mind to have again and again. My lips turned upward and the heat that rose to my cheeks and ears is enough to tell me that I have turned red by now. Should I be called shameless if I say that I like his roughness, the way he dominated my body yesterday was something I never thought I will like but I do. I like each and every side of this man crazily. I tried to keep distance with him in the beginning thinking that it will become difficult for me later but I don't care now, I won't let anyone control my life anymore, I will live it the way I want.
I once again glanced at the clock and it's my time for practice but I don't want to leave him, his possessive and warm hold is pulling me towards him like we are tied in an invisible thread.
I closed my eyes and snuggled in his hard chest which feels like home to me. He is still in his deep sleep but subconsciously he pulled me closer sandwiching my legs in his strong one.
'i love you dami and this fear of loosing you is scaring me to the core, please don't leave me ever....'
*****
Damian's pov...
I stirred in my sleep when I felt something soft tickling on neck. Opening my eyes lazily I saw my little angel, her hair was tickling me. She looks so peaceful while sleeping like this. How can someone look so innocent, her facial features are so delicate and angelic that no one can tell that she is such a threat. My hand involuntarily removed the free strands from her face, she is glowing under the warm morning sunlight. How can I get so lucky to have her, what did I do to deserve her. She came like an angel and filled these empty places in my life and heart. She provided me the comfort I never got. She is the only one who can tolerate my mood swings and my stupid behaviour.
I admired her soft rosy lips and placed soft kisses on them, covering her with the duvet I was about to leave the bed but a soft hold on my hand stopped me. Turning my face towards it I saw her big dove like grey eyes staring at me.
Sitting beside her I looked at her curiously, she wrapped the bedsheet around her naked body and looked at me nervously.
Why is she still so nervous around me. Am I making her like that or is it something else.
If it's because of me then I have to make her comfortable, I can't afford her keeping her feelings locked, I won't play this game, not again.
Caressing her cheeks I snaked my arms around her waist and lifted her up placing her on my lap. She wrapped her legs around my torso and hugged me tightly, keeping her face in my neck. What happened to her suddenly, she never voluntarily came to me, it's the other way around. Is something bothering her.
I placed my hand on the back of her neck and kissed her bare shoulder.
"What happened baby?"
I surprised myself by talking this gently with someone.
"I am sorry Damian..."
I can sense the pain in her voice, why does she sound so hurt. I stayed silent letting her continue...
"I've never meant to hurt you, please forgive me...
I was hurt when I heard those words from you, I felt abandoned and unloved that's why I behaved like that. I thought I am nothing to you and..."
Her voice broke and my eyes widened in shock when I felt wetness on my shoulder.
"Hey, Rose..."
I lifted her face up and saw tears in her eyes. This is the first time I am seeing her crying and I have no complaints about it. She is finally showing me her vulnerable side and I am somewhat relieved to see it. "Why are you crying, angel?..."
My voice came out in a concerned tone and another tear dropped from her eyes.
"I can't stay away from you, please don't leave me alone..."
My heart started racing fast when I heard these words from her mouth. Am I still asleep and this is just a dream or is it real. Is she really confessing her feelings to me.
If it's a dream then I don't want to come out of this, I want to see my Rose like this, full of emotions and not like a lifeless doll.
"I know, I should have confronted you about it but..."
She tried to continue but the heaviness in her voice told me how much it's difficult for her to open up. I can understand that this is totally new for her, like she has entered into a different world... "Rose, you don't have to apologise baby..."
I held her red crying face in my hands and kissed her tears away.
"I am never going to leave you alone, I can't do that. The mere thought of loosing you scares me angel... And I was not angry with you, yes I was hurt but I can't be angry on you..."
My own heart fluttered with thousands of emotions when I said those words.
Her eyes sparkled at my words and trust me I have seen nothing more beautiful than this, her eyes are my world.
She sniffed and hugged me tightly almost choking me in the process. My lips turned into a smile when she did it, I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her closer.
"I am sorry too Rose... I shouldn't have talked about you like that in the first place, and about that shitty deal also I was stupid to behave like that."
I have never apologised to anyone like this but it's necessary to tell her how I feel, I can't loose her due to my stupidity and impulsiveness.
"It's ok..."
She said trying to control her sobs.
Damn she looks so cute like this, far away from the strict and cold Rose. I can't explain in words how much happy I am to see her like this.
Finally we are opening up to each other and our relationship is starting it's journey.
She moved closer to me, rubbing her sheet covered bottom on my half aroused member in the process.
"Don't move too much, Rose otherwise I will fuck you again..."
I whispered teasingly to lighten the heaviness which was lingering around us due to our emotional confessions.
"No please, I am sore..."
She mumbled in my neck and I can't help but chuckle at her cuteness.
She hardly talks but whenever she does she looks hella cute. People say it right we always have to do some work to achieve good things and I am ready to do that. I will do every possible thing in my capacity to make her open up to me.☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐