Chosen Novel

Chapter 0199

Maybe it was because I knew I was going to suffer yet again, while I tried to strengthen my body, or Maybe it was the fact that I was turning 18 tomorrow and had none of my family with me.

The last five years haven't been all that great in regards to birthdays, but at least I had still woken up to my mom singing horrendously and Freddie giggling at my moms attempt. I'd wake up to a small stack of pancakes which was originally my dad's tradition, and my mom had saved two small birthday candles from the time before the new world, they were extremely worn down by now, but she still made every effort in trying to make it a good day for us both.

I smiled lightly at my memory, I could feel my eyes once again welling up slightly but knew if I allowed myself to cry again, I wouldn't be able to stop, and so I pushed my sorrow down and sighed as I trudged back to my RV, my temporary home.

However after genuinely getting a good nights sleep, and venting everything I was thinking and feeling to poor Lewis, I think maybe I was finally ready to accept my reality. There was just one more thing I needed to do before I could really force myself to get my head out of the past and move on.

I walked over to one of the draws in my RV and opened it revealing two envelopes. One was the homemade birthday card Freddie had done for me, the other was the now very crinkled letter from my mom.

I'd managed to get it out of the blood stained coat I was wearing when I arrived, and stashed it in this draw, where it had been ever since. I swapped the thick lump forming in my throat and grabbed it before once again leaving the camper van.

I mindlessly began to wander back to the big lake, it's water had a calming effect on me which would really help. I knew though, that I couldn't read anything without having some support with me, I needed someone there next to me so I wouldn't chicken out of reading it.

My first thought was Lewis, he seemed to always be there for me whenever I needed him. He also told me that I could look for him whenever I wanted to, but I didn't want to use him, he was far too good and kind for me to do that.

So instead I let my legs take me to the medical area. Maybe being around someone who knew my mom would get me through it.

I had visited Ryan Clarke twice since arriving, he was doing quite well actually, I do however think he was playing on his injuries a bit, it was no secret that he had a huge crush on his personal nurse. The man always did make me laugh.

By the time I got to his RV door, I was having second thoughts about reading my moms letter. I really would break if it turned out she was disappointed in me. I know no matter what happens now, I will never be able to make things up with her.

The thought of my mother flashed through my mind once more, and with that a wave of sadness took over me. Even still, I gently knocked on the door and walked in only to see the man sat up in bed watching the tv, he turned to me quickly with a large closed mouth smile on his face, his mouth was obviously full of something tasty as his right cheek puffed out.

Before I could say anything at all he turned to his left before once again looking back at me, his hand rose up while holding a large box of chocolates. They were the nice kind, the stuff my dad would buy my mom on Valentine’s Day, or my mom would get some for my dad on their anniversary, and I would steal some, with their permission of course, then we would all laugh and end up finishing the box in one sit in.